Cult Flops - Sextette

Crown International Pictures, 1978
Starring Mae West, Timothy Dalton, Dom DeLouise, and Tony Curtis
Directed by Ken Hughes
Music by various

Mae West was one of the most beloved comediennes and sex symbols of the 1930's, known for her frankness about sexual mores and her double ententes. Her movies were so popular in 1933 and 1934, they literally saved Paramount from bankruptcy. She wrote most of her movies and plays, and was a dominating force at a time when women were still too often restricted to the home. The increase in censorship in the mid-30's neutered her films and her creativity, and she largely retired in 1940. With the exception of a cameo in the sitcom Mr. Ed, she was rarely seen again...until she wrote and starred in this film at the ripe age of 84. How does this bizarre paean to West's aging charms look today? Let's head to a deluxe hotel in London, England and find out...

The Story: Marlo Manners (West) is a major movie star and sex symbol who just married handsome young British nobleman Sir Michael Barrington (Dalton) and is looking forward to a night of unbridled passion with him in their bridal suite. Her manager Dan Turner (DeLouise) has other ideas. He wants Marlo to keep up with a demanding schedule that includes fittings with her costume designer (Keith Moon) and auditions with her director (Ringo Starr), who is one of her many ex-husbands. Sir Michael wants her all to himself, but Dan keeps distracting him with news reports that question his sexuality and Marlo's feelings for him.

Marlo, meanwhile, has been tasked with convincing another ex-husband, Russian diplomat Alexai Karansky (Tony Curtis), to vote with a group of politicians at the hotel who are trying to solve the world's problems. She's also trying to keep the diplomats and her current husband from finding the cassette tape she's used to dictate her memoirs, which discuss every affair and marriage she's ever had. And then her gangster ex-husband Vance Norton (George Hamilton) returns from the dead, and she can't remember if they ever actually divorced or not.

The Song and Dance: I give Mae West props for even making this. Many women can barely walk at 84, let alone star in a musical film. No matter how misguided the final product was, the woman had guts. I suspect her star power alone was likely the reason they got so many big names to appear, including famous costumer Edith Head to do West's trademark boas and sequined gowns.

Favorite Number: West and Dalton prove how mismatched they - and Marlo and Sir Michael - are in their odd version "Love Will Keep Us Together." She's half-talking the lyrics, he's singing with fairly decent voice, and the lyrics are re-written to emphasize how young and beautiful West is. DeLouise discusses Marlo's importance to Hollywood - and him - while tapping on her glass piano, "Honey Pie."

Trivia: West had to wear an ear piece during the filming, either because she couldn't remember her lines, or because the script had been re-written so often, she hadn't had time to learn them.

George Raft, who played the Godfather gangster, starred in Mae West's debut picture Night After Night and was the one who recommended her for the role.

What I Don't Like: Um, yeah, you can tell this was re-written multiple times. Nothing makes the tiniest bit of sense. While it is amusing for Dalton to suddenly be revealed as secret agent to rival James Bond, given his later career, this has no build-up, nor any previous reference in the script. Everyone goes from trying to destroy Marlo's memoirs because of the sensitive information they contain, to trying to find them for the same reason. What are the politicians doing, besides vaguely arguing? It's never said why Alexai's vote is so important, or why Marlo has to persuade him to go along with the others.

I give West props for trying to revive her career in her twilight years, but she should have been more honest about her age. Every man in the film falls at her feet and drools over her, and everyone keeps singing about how young and beautiful she is. While she does seem to have aged fairly well, she's still an 84-year-old woman. That "Love Will Keep Us Together" duet with Dalton is creepy and awkward at best. Her singing "Happy Birthday Twenty One" to the sports team who are also staying at the hotel is even worse.

The numbers are a problem, too. Like the plot, they're dropped into the movie with no rhyme or reason. I've seen early talkie musicals that work the songs into their stories more organically than the big "Hooray for Hollywood" chorus number after the wedding or Alice Cooper's song near the end "Next Next."

The Big Finale: This is just flat-out terrible. Only if you're a really, really huge fan of camp, West, or any of the stars involved.

Home Media: Out of print and ridiculously expensive on DVD. Streaming is by far your best bet.

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