Saturday, February 27, 2021

Family Fun Saturday - The Emperor's New Clothes (1987)

The Cannon Group, 1987
Starring Robert Morse, Sid Caesar, Jason Carter, and Lysette Anthony
Directed by David Irving
Music by Stephan Lawrence; Music by Michael Korie

This was the third Cannon Movie Tale, the low-budget series based around famous fairy and folk tales. It's the only one to adapt a Hans Christian Anderson story, and as you can guess with that cast, to be played as more of a comedy with songs than a fantasy romance. How does the tale of two con-men who swindle an emperor with a supposedly "magical" cloak look today? Let's begin at the seashore, just as a line of prisoners are about to be drowned, and find out...

The Story: The prisoners are spared death by the announcement of the wedding between Princess Gilda (Anthony) and Prince Nino (Danny Segev). Truth be told, independent Gilda doesn't really want to marry the repulsive and bizarre prince, but the wedding was arranged years ago, and her father's prime minister (Clive Revill) insists on it to strengthen their borders. 

Gilda's father the Emperor (Caesar) could probably care less who marries whom. He's far more interested in his elaborate and expensive clothes. The con artists manage to sneak into one of his fashion shows, dress as gentlemen, and pass them selves off as tailors. The elder of the two (Morse) claims they can weave a special cloth made of diamonds that stupid people and those who are unfit for office can't see. The Emperor and his couriers bring him bags of jewels to weave into the "cloth," but the head guard (Yehuda Efroni) is suspicious. Meanwhile, his nephew (Carter) falls for Gilda, who certainly finds him more attractive than the obnoxious, spider-collecting Nino.

The Song and Dance: The central performances are the thing here. Morse and Caesar have the most fun as the wild-eyed huckster always on the lookout for his next adventure and the clothes-obsessed monarch who desperately wants to appear in something different and unique at his daughter's wedding. I also like that we have another spunky, tough princess in Gilda who figures out their scheme a lot faster than her father and his court. Appropriately, the costumes are nifty and detailed, especially for something low-budget. Check out the Emperor's golden Greek-inspired ensembles with the grape trim on the shoulders of his capes! 

Favorite Number: Caesar introduces the Emperor and his vanity as he explains to his couriers why "Clothes Make the Man" and he must have more of them. Morse and Carter sing about going on "The Adventure of the Century" outside of the gates of the castle, and after they've gotten in and dressed as nobles. Morse gleefully performs "Weave-O" as they work on the non-existent cloth to convince the court that they're actually doing something.

What I Don't Like: Beyond the two leads and Anthony, the remaining actors just aren't that interesting. Carter is an especially bland hero, and really not terribly believable as a con artist. No wonder he wanted out. The songs aren't that memorable, either. With the accent firmly on comedy, the movie often feels as if it doesn't know if it wants to play the story straight or as a spoof of romantic fairy tales. Carter and Anthony's love duet "Is This a Love Song?" bears out that confusion as the two wonder how they ended up in a romantic movie ballad in the first place. There's also the usual Cannon cheap sets and tinny score clashing with the more sumptuous outfits. 

The Big Finale: Not my favorite Cannon Movie Tale, but far from horrible if you're a fan of either leading men or the original Hans Christian Andersen story.

Home Media: One of the easier Cannon Movie Tales to find, it's currently on DVD and free for streaming on Tubi.

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