Cult Flops - I'm Not There

The Weinstein Company, 2007

Starring Cate Blanchett, Heath Ledger, Christian Bale, and Marcus Carl Franklin

Directed by Todd Haymes

Music and Lyrics by Bob Dylan and others

Better Man isn't the first film biography in the past twenty years to experiment with the format. Likewise, A Complete Unknown is far from the first time a director tried to get into Bob Dylan's head. After his success with the romantic drama Far from Heaven, Haynes went experimental with this look at Dylan's many personas. Six actors play Dylan in time periods ranging from the early 20th century to the mid-70's, filmed in styles and genres ranging from documentary to western. How well does this come off today? Let's begin with folk-rock star Jude Quinn (Blanchett) on an operating table after a motorcycle accident and find out...

The Story: Actually, there's six stories, representing six different periods in Dylan's life. Eleven-year-old black youth Woody Guthrie (Franklin) travels on the rails, performing his blues protest songs for unimpressed hobos. He's taken in by a couple after he nearly drowns, but a call from a corrections officer sends him off again. He eventually ends up in a hospital to connect with his idol, the real Woody Guthrie. 19-year-old Arthur Rimbaud (Ben Whishaw) is our first black-and-white segment. He's being questioned, though it's never clear why or by whom. 

Jack Rollins (Bale) was a legend among folk artists in Grenwich Village during the early 60's, but disappeared by the middle of the decade after making insulting remarks at an awards ceremony. He's discovered a decade later in California, now a born-again Christian priest known as Father John. Actor Robbie Clark (Ledger) plays Rollins in a film biopic, but his sexism and stardom strains his relationship with his wife Claire (Charlotte Gainesbourg). 

Quinn is castigated for using electric instruments at a folk concert. He agrees with Rollins that folk has hit a wall and doesn't seem to be living up to its own lofty ideals. The snooty interviewer in England (Bruce Greenwood) who reveals that his past isn't as wild as he claims doesn't help his descent into drug addiction. Legendary outlaw Billy the Kid (Richard Gere) tries to keep the town he's now living in from being demolished for a highway by none other than the man who supposedly killed him, Pat Garret (Greenwood)...but his attempt to confront him ends with him on the road again.

The Song and Dance: No wonder Blanchett was nominated for a host of acting awards, including an Oscar for Supporting Actress. She's mesmerizing as the increasingly erratic genius in her segments, giving him a measure of tender vulnerability and even gentleness under the rage. Franklin also does well as the cheeky African-American boy who ignores criticism to perform his way and is determined to meet his idol. Haynes's work here is equally amazing. The quick editing takes us seamlessly from Woody's late 50's all the way back around, jumping from time period to time period as we learn how one period relates to the next.

The Numbers: We open with "Stuck Inside of Mobile With the Memphis Blues Again," performed by Dylan himself over black-and-white images of the ordinary people Dylan sang to in the 60's the ends with Woody jumping on the train. Woody sings "When My Ship Comes In" the white couple who rescues him from drowning. He does even better with the old black gentleman (Richie Havens) who performs "Tombstone Blues" with him. 

Fellow folkie Alice Fabian (Julianne Moore) recalls her first meeting with Rollins and how he was the voice of his generation as we see him singing "The Times They are A'Changin" at a student protest. "Trouble In Mind" gives us Woody being attacked by hobos trying to steal his guitar, while "Visions of Johanna" give us how Robbie and Claire ended their relationship as the Vietnam War ended. "I Want You" depicts the happier start of their relationship. 

A rollicking "Maggie's Farm" performed by Stephen Malkmus at a folk festival is nearly drowned out by the boos of a shocked crowd. He also gets "Ballad of a Thin Man" in a whimsical montage that depicts the interviewer searching for the truth about Quinn, ending at a Black Panther meeting as they too are influenced by Quinn's music and Quinn stumbling around onstage when the crowd boos him. "One More Cup of Coffee" has Billy riding through town, admiring children in costume. "Goin' to Acapulco," sung by a white-faced man in the town, has a distinctly Mexican flavor. 

The Monkees' "I'm Not Your Steppin' Stone" gives us the voices of another group of artists who struggled for artistic integrity over the party where Quinn admits he couldn't handle the European tour. Quinn and Rollins all question that "Trouble In Mind" as Rollins explains his religious conversion and Quinn hangs out with poet Alan Ginsburg (David Cross). Dylan's gospel period is represented by "Pressin' On," as Robbie and Claire do just that in their marriage; Claire and the people of Billy's town are the "Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands." "The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carrol" gets Billy out on a train and lets Robbie take his girls on a trip. The movie finishes with footage of the real Dylan playing his harmonica for a sold-out crowd.

Trivia: The grungy Billy the Kid segment was inspired by the violent "hippie westerns" of the late 60's like Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid, which Bob Dylan did music for. The stark black and white Quinn story took its look from Fellini's 8 1/2 and the Neo-Realist movement of the 60's. Robbie's segment got its inspiration from the films of Jean-Luc Goddard. 

This would be Heath Ledger's last movie released in theaters before his untimely death in 2008. 

What I Don't Like: I think it's abundantly clear that this is not your typical musical biography. Those looking for something more linear or upbeat will want to go elsewhere. Gere and Ledger are defeated by material that's less interesting than Blanchett and Franklin's segments. Whishaw is seen the least and barely has anything to do besides toss out a few quotes. And...yeah, at times, once again particularly in Gere and Ledger's segments, you wonder if there's actually a point to any of this. You don't really learn much more about Dylan than you did coming in, which, given how enigmatic the real Dylan continues to be to this day, is likely what they were going for.

The Big Finale: I'm going to say your enjoyment of this one will depend on your fondness for Dylan and willingness to try something different in your musical bios. If you're a fan of his who wants to see the before and after of A Complete Unknown and are willing to go off the beaten path, there's a lot to enjoy in this unique experiment.

Home Media: It's on DVD, but it can be far more easily found on streaming, including Tubi for free with commercials.

DVD

Amazon Prime

Tubi

Better Man

Paramount, 2024

Starring Robbie Williams, Jonno Davies, Steve Pemberton, and Kate Mulvany

Directed by Michael Gracey

Music and Lyrics by various

Our first theatrical musical of 2025 is another rock biography, but is otherwise a very different animal than A Complete Unknown...literally, given its lead is depicted as a walking, talking ape. British rock star Robbie Williams got his start as part of boy band Take That, but he really rocketed to celebrity when he went solo in the mid-late 90's. He thought fame would make him the man he'd always wanted to be, but he was haunted by his insecurities and self-medicated with drugs and alcohol instead. How does the story of how he survived his demons look nowadays, with a string of similar stories having already come and gone? Let's begin with a distinctly simian Williams (Davies) explaining how he always felt less "evolved" than others and find out...

The Story: As a child growing up in Stoke-On-Trent, England, Robert Williams wanted nothing more to be a singer like his idol Frank Sinatra. His father Peter (Pemberton) is obsessed with Sinatra and the idea of fame, claiming to his son that the admiration of the audience is everything. Robert is devastated when he walks away from the family to become a stand-up comic and misses his debut in the school play. 

Years later, Robert drops out of high school to audition for a boy band. He's almost rejected, but gruff manager Nigel Martin-Smith (Damon Herriman) likes his spunk and hires him. Robert is rechristened Robbie, and becomes the wild "bad boy" of the phenomenally successful Take That. They start out in gay clubs, but by the time they're playing for sold-out crowds of screaming girls, they're an international success. 

Robbie, however, is still filled with doubt and wants more creative control. He finally breaks with the group and goes solo. At first, his solo career seems destined for success. He falls for singer Nicole Appleton (Raechelle Banno) of the group All-Saints, reconnects with his father, and makes a comeback with the help of songwriter Guy Chambers (Tom Budge). Unfortunately, his solo success does nothing to help his inner demons. His father encourages his drinking and debauchery, Nicole leaves him over his cheating, and his beloved grandmother Betty (Alison Steadiman) dies. After a disastrous concert at Knebworth, Robbie realizes that fame is a double-edged sword...and the only person who really needs to love him is himself.

The Song and Dance: First of all, I will admit that, while not a huge fan of Williams or Take That, I had friends who were fans of Williams in the early-mid 2000's and remember hearing music from both on the radio in the 90's and early 2000's. Maybe that's why I enjoyed this as much as I did. I'm familiar enough with Williams' work for this to not be a total surprise, but aren't a big enough fan to know every detail of his life. 

The motion capture work on this was incredible. Yes, it looks like there's an ape doing flips and dancing on city streets and crying into his grandmother's arms. Davies and Williams do well conveying Robert's pain, while Pemberton does the best of the supporting cast as his father who is obsessed with fame, to the detriment of his relationship with his son. I also give them credit for trying something different with the musical biography format, and for being brave enough to get into fairly dark turf with what's going on in Robbie's simian head. 

The Numbers: Our first actual number is the Sinatra standard "My Way." Nine-year-old Robert and his father perform it side-by-side in their living room. They reprise it in the end onstage, singing together for the first time since then. Robert gives us a boisterous "I am the Pirate King" with his classmates after nearly passing out on entrance. Alas, his father never sees it, leading Robert to perform "Feel" as he laments his father abandoning his family. 

"I Found Heaven" is our first chorus number and the first song with Take That. Robbie and the others sing it in rehearsal, then for those sleazy gay clubs when Robbie realizes he's finally found a place that accepts him for what he is. "Rock DJ" is a massive song and dance all over London after Take That is signed to a major contract, as the boys dance and sing with half the kids in England and show off their more famous concert costumes. Robbie wants to "Relight My Fire" when he leaves the band, but nearly "Comes Undone" during a wild hallucination of driving at insane speeds and ending up trapped under the ice. 

"She's the One" is another massive number, this one a romantic pas-de-deux with Nicole on a gold and white yacht...that's contrasted with their life as he has affairs and she has an abortion. Robbie wishes it would turn into "Something Beautiful," but it's not to be. The classic rock standard "Land of 1000 Dances" gives us another montage, this one of Robbie's increasingly insane performances and his destructive lifestyle. Robbie's best-known songs, the ballad "Angels," plays over his grandmother's funeral and his break-up with Nicole. 

"Let Me Entertain You" begins with him suspended over the crowd at Knebworth and ends with him literally fighting every single version of himself who ever repeated negative self-talk. "Better Man" gets him into a rehab as he finally makes up with his former band mates and his parents. We get Williams' new "Forbidden Road" over end credits photos of the real human entertainer. 

What I Don't Like: First of all, while Williams still has a fair-sized fan base in England, he's not that well-known in the US. I'm surprised Paramount even wanted to put this in the theater over here. I suspect this might have done better catering to niche audiences on Paramount Plus. It's also not for young boy band fans. There's copious nudity, swearing, drinking, and drugs. Start your older kids on Williams and Take That's albums before coming anywhere near here. 

I suspect the real reason this is flopping the box office is it's sometimes too darn weird for its own good. Despite how well they pull it off, just the idea of a rock idol being played by a CGI ape may be enough to put many people off. It's also way too long, with the second half in particular after he goes solo and falls for Nicole dragging like crazy. Some of the story is muddled, and you never know if it happened, or it's all in Robbie's head. 

The Big Finale: I hope this does better on home media and streaming. It's a truly unique gamble that Gracey and Williams manage to pull off spectacularly, and deserves a lot more than the head-scratching it's getting right now.

Home Media: There's no release date for the film yet, but the soundtrack will be out February 7th. 

CD Soundtrack

Animation Celebration Saturday - The Secret of Anastasia

UAV, 1997

Voices of Lisa DeSimone, Jere Shea, Earl Hammond, and Roger Raines

Directed by Lee Lan

Music by Megan Cavallari; Lyrics by David Goldsmith

The Disney movies weren't the only animated films that had imitations made of them in the late 90's and early 2000's. Any animated film that was even remotely popular at the box office had at least two or three cheaper versions of it released on home video by knock-off video companies. We've already seen one movie from UAV's "Secret" series two years ago, The Secret of Mulan. The year before, they put out their own version of the Don Bluth hit Anastasia. Does it match its predecessor, or should it be left behind at the Palace? Let's begin at the palace, as a narrator (Raines) explains what happened to the Romanov family and why Anastasia (DeSimone) now lives by herself along with four talking musical instruments, and find out...

The Story: Anastasia and her friends are finally forced to flee the Winter Palace when they're attacked by the Secret Police. They end up on a box car bound for Copenhagen, where they encounter former general Vladmir Ikonovich (Shea). He's taken by how much she resembles the lost princess. Ignoring her protests that she is the lost princess, he teaches her how to behave at court and presents her to the Dowager Duchess (Barbara Jean Kearney) at her home in Copenhagen. She doesn't impress the Duchess until she performs a song that only Anastasia knew. 

Handsome Prince Paul (Robert Petkoff) is even more impressed. Vladimir is jealous of the attention he gives her, but Anastasia's musical instrument friends know something is wrong here. The little accordion Alexei (Raines) follows the seemingly charming royal and learns there's something a lot more sinister under the surface, something that could take down the last of the Romanovs for good.

The Animation: Like all UAV productions, this is about as cheap as you can get. The colors are lovely (and actually compliment each other, unlike Secret of Mulan), but the designs are a little weird, with their pale, wide eyes and immobile faces, and there's little detail in the backgrounds. The characters move well enough, but their expressions are either overdone, or they have no expression in scenes that would call on conveying some emotion. Anastasia should be freaking out during Paul's "Prince Charmless" number, not just blinking and looking mild.

The Song and Dance: This wound up being a bit of a surprise. Some of the plot lines here actually make more sense than the Don Bluth Anastasia did, like the Secret Police being the villains instead of Rasputin (who died well before the Romanovs did) and the Dowager Duchess living in her original hometown of Copenhagen. The walking, talking musical instruments are less goofy than they appear at first, especially if you were paying attention to the portraits in the beginning during Alexai's narration. Petkoff is having more fun than he should as Cheka, and DeSimone is a lovely and sweet Anastasia. 

The Numbers: We open with Anastasia and her musical instrument friends in their rooms, singing about how they hope to be "In the Sun" again someday. It's also the song that finally puts her over with the Dowager Duchess when she hears her singing it after being rejected. "A Princess After All" is Vladmir teaching Anastasia how to be a princess, though it occasionally seems she knows more about that subject than him. Paul revels in being "Prince Charmless" when he reveals his real identity to the captive Anastasia. "You Will Be With Me In My Heart" is the finale, as Anastasia's instruments make the ultimate sacrifice to bring Vladmir back to her.

What I Don't Like: In addition to the lousy animation and so-so music, for every plot point they came up with that is honestly better than the movie its imitating, there's two that don't work. Vladimir had a point - why did Anastasia's friends have to be awkward instruments? They could have been anything. Anastasia  herself comes off as more naive and less feisty than the Don Bluth version, but that could be because this Anastasia has lived in one room all  her life, rather than an orphanage. Chaka himself is so wonderfully over the top, he didn't need the annoying skinny sidekick with the raven stumbling around him. Oh, and Anastasia has two more sisters who aren't mentioned or included here. 

My biggest problem is, this does do so much that's right, I wish it could have expanded on it. It needs at least another 20 to 30 minutes to give us a better idea of the characters and maybe show us more of the Revolution and how Anastasia ended up in those rooms in the Winter Palace and her and Vladmir's romance.

The Big Finale: Not a bad way to spend an hour on a cold winter's day if you're a fan of Anastasia or are looking for something fun to watch with your older kids.

Home Media: Easily found anywhere. Many streaming companies have it for free.

DVD

Tubi

The Roku Channel

Gold Diggers of 1937

Warner Bros, 1936

Starring Dick Powell, Joan Blondell, Victor Moore, and Glenda Farrell

Directed by Lloyd Bacon

Music by Harry Warren and Harold Arlen; Lyrics by E.Y Harburg and Al Dubin

Despite the success of the 1935 Gold Diggers, Warners was starting to notice diminishing returns with its other Berkeley-esque backstage extravaganzas and lowered the budget on this one. Bacon took over the directing reigns here, letting Berkeley to concentrate on what he did best - creating elaborate dance numbers that let the cameras do the dancing. The studio initially wanted Arlen and Harburg to write the music, but they were so disappointed with the results, they brought Dubin and Warren back in. How well did they all do with the bizarre story of a life insurance salesman who convinces a Broadway producer to buy life insurance and has to keep him alive in order for him to continue to make money from it look today? Let's begin at an insurance convention in Atlantic City and find out...

The Story: Rosmer Peek (Powell) is the top salesman with his insurance company. He hires former chorus girl Norma Perry (Blondell) as his secretary and convinces Broadway producer J.J Hobart (Moore) to sign a million-dollar life insurance policy. His partners Morty Wethered (Osgood Perkins) and Tom Hugo (Charles D. Brown) squandered all of Hobart's money in the stock market. They want that million dollars to back a new Broadway show and do everything they can to push him closer to death, including sending gold digger Genevieve Larkin (Farrell) to seduce him. Genevieve ends up falling for him instead. Now there might not be a show, unless Rosmer and his friends can find another way to get the money without losing their million-dollar golden goose in the process.

The Song and Dance: I give them credit for going with a truly original story this time. I don't know of too many other musicals about singing insurance salesmen and the business of selling insurance. I also love how the insurance company eventually earns the money - via Genevieve's genuine gold digger girlfriends and the wealthy insurance men the snagged at the beginning of the film. Powell and Blondell had just gotten married a few months before this movie's release, and you can see that in their strong chemistry and playful performances. Moore's so adorable as the hypochondriac producer having the most fun he's ever had in his life, you can understand why Genevieve fell for him. Some great costumes, too, especially in the big Berkeley number in the finale, "All's Fair In Love and War."

The Numbers: We open with Powell singing the hit "With Plenty of Money and You" before and during the credits. He also gets our first chorus number, encouraging his fellow salesmen to increase their morale with "The Life Insurance Song." The first version of "Speaking of the Weather" is, surprisingly for a Berkeley musical, a plot number. Rosmer tries to flirt with Norma, even as a storm scatters the paperwork on  her desk everywhere. It's charming and cute, and Powell and Blondell have fun with it. 

"Let's Put Our Heads Together" is another chorus number as everyone at the party for the life insurance company find romance. We also get a bit of "Speaking of the Weather" here as Rosmer's buddy Boop Oglethorpe (Lee Dixon) shows off a wild, arms-and-legs tap routine and Genevieve dances with J.J. "Speaking of the Weather" is reprised again as part of the "All's Fair In Love and War" finale. This men against women military satire begins with all the lovers spooning in massive rocking chairs. This is traded in for military formations as over a hundred women in white uniforms create Berkeley's iconic overhead patterns.

Trivia: A sixth song, "Hush Mah Mouth," was apparently filmed but not used.

What I Don't Like: Did I mention how weird this is? Life insurance seems like a pretty odd subject for a musical, and mixing it with the backstage shenanigans doesn't make much sense. The "All's Fair" number is somewhat scaled-down compared to the bigger, more dramatic "Lullaby of Broadway" and "The Words are the Music In My Heart" from Gold Diggers of 1935. Considering "Plenty of Money" went on to be a hit in its own right, I'm surprised it only gets that quick run-through from Powell before the credits. You'd think Berkeley would have built that up into a big money-based number like in the earlier Gold Diggers of 1933. 

The Big Finale: Worth catching if you're a fan of the cast or the Berkeley backstage imitations of the 1930's for the good numbers and performances.

Home Media: Easy to find on DVD and streaming, the former currently from the Warner Archive.

DVD

Amazon Prime

Gold Diggers of 1935

Warner Bros, 1935

Starring Dick Powell, Gloria Stuart, Alice Brady, and Hugh Herbert

Directed by Busby Berkeley

Music by Harry Warren and Al Dubin

Warners and Busby Berkeley were on a roll with their series of backstage comedies featuring snappy repartee, Warren and Dubin's memorable music, and a rotating troupe of not-so-naive ingenues, tough dames, snooty rich backers, desperate directors, and husband-hunting chorus girls. Gold Diggers of 1933 was such a smash, Warners turned it into a series of unrelated backstage musicals revolving around show business folks butting heads with high society. How does the second Gold Diggers movie - and the first full directing assignment for Berkeley - look nowadays? Let's begin as the various managers of the resort hotel Wentworth Plaza admonish their staff on how to treat their wealthy guests and find out...

The Story: Among those wealthy guests are Matilda Prentiss (Brady), a millionairess who keeps her money by spending as little of it as she can. She's trying to encourage her daughter Ann (Stuart) to wed rich and eccentric T. Mosley Thorpe (Herbert), but Ann finds him and his constant talk about his snuff box collection to be insufferably silly and dull. Matilda has already had to bail Ann's brother Humbolt (Frank McHugh) out of four bad marriages and has no desire for her daughter go through the same, but Ann is bored and fed up with both Thorpe and her mother's stranglehold on her. 

Mrs. Prentiss hires desk clerk Dick Curtis (Powell) to escort her daughter around the resort and keep her out of trouble. Dick does it for the money, but he soon falls for intelligent and feisty Ann. Meanwhile, Mrs. Prentiss swears she'll throw the least amount possible into the annual charity show for the Milk Fund, but flamboyant Russian director Nicolai Nicoleff (Adolph Menjou) ends up spending her money like water on lavish numbers. He's hoping to skim off the earnings with the help of hotel manager Louis Lampson (Grant Mitchell), even as stenographer Betty Hawes (Glenda Farrell) blackmails Thorpe.

The Song and Dance: With a story that flimsy, "song and dance" are definitely the operative words here. Though Powell and Stuart have good moments as the star-crossed pair, the real stars are the supporting cast. Brady and Menjou are hilarious as the stingy older woman who laments losing even a penny of her vast wealth and the desperate Russian director who hopes her money will make a hit and put him back in the black. Herbert also has some good moments as the silly snuff box collector, while McHugh and Dorothy Dare as Dick's fiancee make a surprisingly cute second couple. There's some amazing sets and costumes in this film too, both in Berkeley's big musical numbers and in and around the massive New Hampshire resort.

The Numbers: Our first number is an instrumental dance routine for the many workers who keep the Wentworth Plaza humming and its guests happy, from dancing street sweepers outside the hotel to maids who are seen in Berkeley overhead shots. Dick says "I'm Goin' Shoppin' With You" as he and Ann purchase a whole new wardrobe from Berkeley chorus girl shop keepers and spend her mother's money. We originally hear "The Words are In My Heart" when Dick serenades Ann during a moonlit boat ride. It's reprised later in the Milk Fund show, this time in a far more elaborate Berkeley routine. The number starts with Dick and Ann singing in the woods before moving to three sisters playing the piano. This turns into rows and rows of chorus girls in whites performing with pianos that seemingly dance around them, thanks to the men obviously moving around under them.

The big number by far is "Lullaby of Broadway." We begin in darkness, as the camera moves in on Wini Shaw singing the number. She turns into an animated skyline, which becomes shots of the typical day of a working girl (Shaw). Eventually, she goes out with her tuxedo-clad lover (Powell) to a nightclub where we get massive lines of men in tuxes and chorus girls in surprisingly scanty black costumes for a movie made shortly after the Production Code began tapping their hearts out on enormous Art-Deco risers. The whole thing moves to conclusion that might be a little too dark for both the upbeat songs and this largely fluffy movie.

Trivia: Gloria Stuart did have some success in the 30's, including this film, but she's best-known to most audiences nowadays as the elder Rose who tells the flashback sequences in the 1997 Titanic. 

"Lullaby of Broadway" won Best Original Song and Best Dance Direction in 1935.

What I Don't Like: I wish they came up with a more interesting story to stuff between those crazy numbers. It lacks the Depression grit of the 1933 entries and has more in common with the runaway heiress screwball comedies that were also popular in this era. "Lullaby of Broadway" is such a brilliant number, it feels totally disconnected from - and out of place in - the rest of the film. It's also a lot darker than the rest of the movie, including that downer ending.

The Big Finale: Worth seeing for the numbers alone if you're a fan of Berkeley or the big backstage musicals of the 1930's.

Home Media: It's currently pricey on DVD. Your best bet might be streaming.

DVD

Amazon Prime

Animation Celebration Saturday - The Lion King II: Simba's Pride

Disney, 1998

Voices of Neve Campbell, James Marsden, Matthew Broderick, and Suzanne Pleshette

Directed by Darrell Rooney

Music and Lyrics by various

In honor of the Lion King prequel Mufasa that's currently in theaters, we're jumping back to another attempt to extend the Lion King franchise. Honestly, this follow-up makes more sense than some of the other random direct-to-home-media sequels Disney put out in the 90's and early 2000's. The Lion King is their own material, not a fairy tale that was never meant to be continued, and the original film does end with the birth of a new Lion King. 

In fact, considering that film's overwhelming success, it might have been more surprising if they didn't release a sequel to it. Is it worthy of the first film, or should it be banished to the Outlands? Let's begin where the first film left off with the birth of Simba (Broderick) and Nala's (Moira Kelly) daughter Kiara (Michelle Horn) and find out...

The Story: Kiara is tired of her father constantly hovering over her and not letting her leave his sight, so she wanders to the Outlands to escape him and her bodyguards Timon (Nathan Lane) and Puumba (Ernie Sabella). She befriends a smaller cub named Kovu (Ryan O'Donahue) who saves her from a crocodile-filled river. Simba comes to rescue her, only to discover that Kovu's mother is Zira (Pleshette), a follower of Scar. Zira's training Kovu to kill Simba and allow her to regain the throne.

Years later, the adult Kovu (Marsden) once again rescues Kiara (Campbell), this time from a wildfire set by his sister Vitani (Meredith Scott Lynn) and his brother Nuka (Andy Dick). Simba does let Kovu join the Pridelanders, even though he doesn't trust the younger lion. Rafiki (Robert Gulliame), who has been instructed by the spirit of Mufasa (James Earl Jones) to bring Kiara and Kovu together, does his best to introduce them to "upendi" (Swahili for "Love") while Kovu trains Kiara as a hunter.

Their love is challenged when Zira and the Outlanders attack Simba. Simba thinks Kovu initiated it and banishes him. Horrified, Kiara goes off in search of Kovu, while Timon and Pumba follow her. It's the two lovers who finally bring everyone together to show that, no matter whom they follow, they're all still lions deep down and aren't all that different from one another.

The Animation: This isn't bad, per se, but it's far from great. Even The Lion Guard Disney Jr. TV show from 15 years after this had more detail and better movement. Like all of the Disney direct-to-home-media sequels from this period, it looks like a Disney Channel cartoon. It's colorful and the animals still remain very expressive (especially Timon and Pumba), but the backgrounds aren't nearly as detailed.

The Song and Dance: Given its made-for-TV pedigree, this is probably better than it has any right to be. Pleshette is definitely having the most fun as the angry and scheming Zira. Dick is also good as her equally nasty older son who laments that he should have been "the Chosen One" who followed in Scar's paw prints. Broderick is even more interesting here as a Simba grappling with raising a feisty daughter and how to deal with the specter of his past than he was in the first film. The majestic opening number "He Lives In You" is far and above the best song in the score. It was taken from the cassette Rhythm of the Pride Lands and has far more African flavor than anything else in the film. 

The Numbers: And we open with "He Lives In You" as we see Kiara's birth and its aftermath. Simba teaches his daughter how "We are One" after her harrowing adventure in the Outlands. "My Lullaby" is anything but soothing as Zira reminds her children of their place and what she's trained them for. Rafiki teaches Kira, Kovu, and all of the Pridelands about "Upendi" in the film's big chorus number. The other chorus routine is "One of Us" as Kovu is accepted into the Pridelands. Kira and Kovu hope "Love Will Find a Way" and reunite them for good.

What I Don't Like: This is cliched as heck, and nothing you haven't seen before. Timon and Pumba basically have nothing to do besides a few moments chasing Kiara. They don't even get a comic song this time. The delightfully nasty Zira and troubled Simba are shoved aside in favor of the bland Kiara and Kovu. "He Lives In You" and to a lesser degree "We are One" are the only songs of even mild interest. "Love Will Find A Way" is an imitation "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" that's just as dull as the characters singing it.

The Big Finale: Mainly of interest to huge fans of anyone in the cast or the original animated Lion King or Lion Guard. 

Home Media: Easily found on all formats, including streaming on Disney Plus.

DVD

Blu-Ray

Disney Plus

Ice-Capades (1941)

Republic Pictures, 1941

Starring James Ellison, Dorothy Lewis, Phil Silvers, and Jerry Colonna

Directed by Joseph Santley

Music and Lyrics by various

With many parts of the US expecting snow or cold weather this weekend and early next week, I thought this B-movie rarity from Republic Pictures would be perfect for the first review of 2025. The Ice Capades began in 1940 as a touring skating show for a string of arenas in the northeast. The shows were such tremendous sell-out successes that Hollywood took notice. 

Many of the real Ice Capades skaters at the time, including European skating champs Belita and Vera Hruba, appeared in what was a relatively lavish production for low-budget Republic. How did they manage to concoct a story about a photographer and one of the skaters for what was essentially a revue on ice? Let's begin in a snow-bound New York as Colonna (Colonna) awakens his hungover newsreel cameraman partner Bob Clemens (Ellison) and find out...

The Story: Bob is supposed to be shooting champion Swiss ice queen Karen Vadja (Renie Riano), but he misses his plane and his chance to catch her in action. He assumes one skater is no different from another and films a woman (Lewis) at a rink in New York, claiming she's Vadja. Turns out the lady is Marie Bergin, a fine skater who also happens to be an illegal immigrant on the run from detectives.

 Promoter Larry Herman (Silvers) is enchanted with the woman and wants to make her a star...at least until they figure out that Vadja looks nothing like this lovely creature. Bob first has to find her...then he and Herman have to convince her to come out of hiding and star in the new show that Larry developed for her and other major skaters, Ice-Capades, even if Bob has to marry her to do it. 

The Song and Dance: Not the greatest movie in the universe, but there's some nice bits. Ellison is fairly cute as the devoted bachelor whose indifference to women and to skating ends up causing most of the commotion. Silvers has a few good bits that foreshadow his later con-artist characters in movies and TV, too. Jerry Colonna and Barbara Jo Allen have several routines that show why their Professor and Vera Vague characters were huge on the radio in the late 30's and 40's. Some of the skating numbers aren't bad and give us a good idea of what appearing in a big touring ice show like the Ice Capades was like in the early 40's. 

The Numbers: Our first number begins without music, as Colonna and Bob film Marie's routine on the pond across from Bob's apartment in New York. Music is added later when it's shown to a rapturous audience that includes Larry and his assistant Dave (Gus Schilling). Our first professional ice number is from comedians Jackson (Tim Ryan) and Reed (Harry Clark), who give us slapstick shenanigans on skates. Al Surrette is another dancing comedian, this one dressed as a loose-limbed scarecrow. Ice dance team the Benoits get a brief Latin-flavored couples routine next. British figure skater Megan Taylor gives a brief but dynamic solo routine next that shows why she won the World Championships in 1938 and 1939. 

Colonna gets to show off on a ukulele for Allen with his goofy one-man chorus number. During the rehearsal, we get Phil Taylor as a horseman flanked by fellow skating riders in what amounts to a solo routine before giving way to Lois Dworshak and her far jazzier Jitterbugs. Dworshak gets a blusier solo routine. While on a date in Central Park with Bob, Marie dreams of stardom in the Ice Capades, in a romantic solo flanked by young men in top hats and chorus girls in long gown. The Benoits return for a couples routine with the chorus before Marie returns. There's even a few Busby Berkeley overhead shots of skaters at one point.

"Forever and Ever" is the song supposedly written for Marie and performed by a Romani tenor at the restaurant where Bob takes her on a date. Belita opens the finale with a graceful and romantic solo that shows why she was snatched up to be rival B-studio Monogram's big skating queen shortly after the release of this film. The big finale "Legend of the Falls" features Taylor, Lewis, and Vera Hruba putting in lovely performances in rather ridiculous Native American costumes in Hollywood's idea of a folk dance on ice, including chorus girls "playing" tom toms and skaters turning up in cowboy costumes. 

Trivia: Movie debuts of Belita and Vera Hruba (later Vera Hruba Ralston after she married the head of Republic Pictures).

Ice Capades would remain one of the most popular ice skating shows in the world through the 1980's. By the end of the 80's, it began to lose ground to newer shows that focused on families (Disney On Ice) or major figure skating stars (Stars On Ice). After running through a series of owners (including former skating star Dorothy Hamill), it was disbanded in 1997. Attempts to revive it in 2000 and 2008 went nowhere.

What I Don't Like: This is pretty obviously a B-musical from 1941. Though more lavish than the Republic norm for the early 40's, the cardboard sets and claustrophobic direction clearly give away its origins. For all they praise her beauty and skating, Lewis has the appeal of a melting snow cone. She certainly doesn't look or sound like an illegal immigrant on the run from the authorities. There's a reason this would be her only appearance on film. 

The Big Finale: This hard to find movie is only of interest to fans of Colonna, his radio shows, or vintage figure skating. Everyone else will probably be bored between numbers. 

Home Media: It's so rare, the only place you can currently find it is on a copy at the Internet Archive that's likely taken from an 80's or 90's TV broadcast. 

Internet Archive