Cult Flops - The Pirates of Penzance

Universal, 1983
Starring Kevin Kline, Angela Landsbury, Rex Smith, and Linda Rondstat
Directed by Wilford Leach
Music by Arthur Sullivan; Lyrics by W.S Gilbert

This more faithful adaptation of the hit 1981 revival of the Gilbert and Sullivan nautical favorite came out about six months after The Pirate Movie...and despite using most of the original cast and music, it didn't do any better at the box office than its predecessor. Is this one an improvement over the very goofy Pirate Movie? Let's head to the sleepy English seaside town of Penzance, just before it receives a few rude and noisy guests, and find out...

The Story: Fredric (Smith) is about to leave the apprenticeship of a group of less-than-bloodthirsty pirates, including its lively Pirate King (Kline). Turns out that his nurse Ruth (Landsbury) was hard of hearing and accidentally apprenticed him to the pirates, rather than to a pilot. That sends both Fredric and Ruth to shore. Ruth's hoping to flirt with him, but after Fredric sees a group of lovely lasses on the shore, he realizes that Ruth is past her prime and not quite so beautiful as them. He arrives at shore to greet the ladies. They're all afraid of him, except for sweet youngest Mabel (Rondstat). The pirates follow him and try to kidnap the ladies, but their Major General father (George Rose) claims to be an orphan. The pirates won't hurt orphans and take off.

Fredric is ready to lead the local police force against the pirates, at least until the Pirate King and Ruth turn up again and reveal that the terms of his apprenticeship insist that he stays until he's 21 - and his birthday is on Leap Year Day. Fredric tells them that, not only are the cops after them, but the Major General lied. The ensuing battle eventually takes over the entirety of Penzance, including a performance of the other big seaside-themed Gilbert and Sullivan show, H.M.S Pinafore.

The Song and Dance: The cast is the thing here. Kevin Kline is in his element as the randy ruler of the buccaneers, chewing every bit of scenery and having a blast swinging around the sets. Landsbury is almost as fun as Ruth, especially in the second half when she's joined the pirates. Smith and Rondstat sing beautifully together, and the chorus is having a ball. There isn't even a a passing attempt at the outdoor shooting in Pirate Movie. It's all detailed, very theatrical sets and costumes.

Favorite Number: Kline tears into his opening solo "I am the Pirate King" with relish, while Landsbury does well by her "When Fredric Was a Little Lad" and her duet with Smith on the beach, "You Deceived Me." Rondstat does a lovely "Poor Wandering One" and joins Smith for a gorgeous series of duets ending with "Oh Here Is Love and Here Is Truth." Smith's best moment is his spoof of Elvis Prestley and other rockers of the 50's and 60's in "Oh Is There Not One Maiden Breast."

I'm especially fond of the chorus numbers. "Climbing Over Rocky Mountain" is just as much fun here sans parasols, and the entire finale, from "When a Felon's Not Engaged In His Employment" to the last dance, is an absolute delight. (Especially how they burst into that performance of Pinafore. It reminds me a bit of a similar sequence in Blazing Saddles when the townspeople's fight disrupts a musical being filmed.)

What I Don't Like: This may stick a little too closely to the original production. It's very artificial and theatrical, lacking the gorgeous real-life scenery of The Pirate Movie. If you don't love stage musicals, you probably won't get what this is going for. It's not for people who don't love operetta, either. It's almost entirely through-sung, with only a little dialogue. While the "modern" gags aren't nearly as numerous as in Pirate Movie, there's still a few that may take people out of the late 19th-century setting (including Smith's Elvis spoof in "Maiden Breast").

The Big Finale: This is the one for Gilbert and Sullivan purists. If you love their shows, the cast, swashbucklers, or the theater, you'll want to "take heart" and wander over to Penzance to check this one out.

Home Media: Unlike Pirate Movie, this one is easily found in all formats, including many streaming companies.

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