Beware! (1946)

Astor Pictures, 1946

Starring Louis Jordan, Frank H. Wilson, Emory Richardson, and Valerie Black

Directed by Bud Pollard

Music and Lyrics by various

This week, we dive into Black History Month with two "race movies" from the late 40's. From the 1910's through the early 50's, black filmmakers made movies directly for African-American audiences. They were usually low-budget efforts released through small independent companies, but some of them, especially in the silent era, could get quite elaborate. Later films featured singers, performers, and orchestras who were often neglected or could only manage cameos in mainstream movies of the time. Most of these films were largely forgotten or lost until they started to show up on cable in the 90's, and later streaming. Now that many of them are more visible, are they worth checking out, or should they be left at school? Let's start at Ware College in Ohio with Professor  (Frank H. Wilson) and find out...

The Story: Lucius "Louis" Jordan (Jordan) attended Ware in his younger years, but is now a famous bandleader. He and his band are passing through and only end up there because their train is being held over. Ware is in the midst of major enrollment and financial problems. The son of the founder Benjamin Ware III (Milton Woods) wants to close the school and marry pretty teacher Annabelle Brown (Black). Annabelle only has eyes for Louis, whom she's had a crush on for years. She and the head of the school Dean Hargreaves (Emory Richardson) convince Louis and his band to put on a show that will save the school. Louis is more interested in figuring out what's going on with Benjamin Ware, who seems a little too interested in having his family's namesake college shut down.

The Song and Dance: Jordan's no actor, but he is a charmer in this surprisingly fun low-budget effort. It's no worse than other school-based musicals of the period. In fact, just this being set at an all-black college in Ohio makes it a little bit more unique than most college shows. There's some really nice music, too, including Jordan's not-bad rendition of the Billie Holliday standard "Good Morning Heartbreak." 

The Numbers: Our introduction to Jordan and His Orchestra is the rollicking "How Long Must I Wait For You?" in a montage on a train that shows us Jordan's success. He sings a lovely "Good Morning Heartbreak" the day after encountering Annabelle again for the first time in years. He and his orchestra perform "In the Land of the Buffalo Nickel" for a tiny class of a few students...that gets bigger and bigger the more they play. He sings and plays "Hold On" on his saxophone for Annabelle, Professor Leary, and the dean...but Ware is only slightly impressed.

Annabelle walks into an instrumental dance routine for the students in her own classroom that doesn't amuse her or Professor Leary. This turns into "You Gotta Have a Beat" when Jordan takes over the class. Their mule mascot inspires Jordan's "Don't Worry 'Bout That Mule." We get another brief instrumental chorus jitterbug routine at the dance before Ware starts admiring Annabelle a little too much. "Long Legged Lizzie" is one heck of a dancer at the school prom after Ware announces that the school isn't closing down. Jordan slows things down with the bluesy "Salt Pork, West Virginia." "Beware, Brother, Beware" is Jordan and the orchestra's warning against the lady who says one thing and does another. We end with "Old Fashioned Passion" as Jordan woos the slightly reluctant Annabelle.

What I Don't Like: First of all, I wish someone would take a crack at restoring more race films. Beware is in only slightly better shape than the 1941 Sunny, all scratches and raspy sound. Second, while the story is slightly stronger than usual for either a race or college movie, it's still full of all the attendant school musical cliches. About the only thing we don't get is a big football game, and they probably didn't have time for that in an hour movie. Note what I said up there about Jordan not being an actor. He's not the only one. Black's there as window dressing, and Woods is so smarmy, I'm surprised Jordan wasn't the only one who figured out what he was up to ages before this. 

The Big Finale: If you're a fan of either Jordan or the black musical films of the 40's, this is worth checking out for the good songs alone.

Home Media: It's in the public domain, so it's easily found anywhere and on most formats. 

DVD - Harlem Double Feature - Jivin' In Be-Bop/Beware

Tubi

Back to School Again - College Holiday

Paramount, 1936

Starring Jack Benny, George Burns, Gracie Allen, and Mary Boland

Directed by Frank Tuttle

Music and Lyrics by various

Our next collegiate story is a bit more unique. Most of Paramount's college-set stories usually took place on the actual campus. This one varies the setting enough to take the kids on vacation to a fictional resort in trouble, with a bit of Busby Berkeley backstage mixed in. How does this strange combination of school, wacky comedians, and then-fashionable theories on human breeding look nowadays? This time, let's begin as those kids dance at their prom and find out...

The Story: Sylvia Smith (Marsha Hunt) is called from the dance by her father, who had a mental breakdown when he found out they might lose their California hotel the Casa Del Mar, thanks to his less-than-astute partner J. Davis Bowster (Benny). The mortgage is held by eccentric heiress Carola Gaye (Boland), who is given to obsess over whatever strange fad catches her fancy. At the moment, that's eugenics and ancient Greek history, thanks to Professor Hercules Dove (Etienne Giradot). Bowster promises her gorgeous college bodies for her eugenics mating program if she'll fund the college kids staying at the hotel. Bowster tells the kids they're there as entertainers, as he wants to raise enough money for them to put on a show.

The kids aren't happy when they discover that Hercules wants his "genetically perfect" daughter Calliope (Allen) to select who gets to pair off. Dick Winters (Leif Erikson) has been trying to find out Sylvia's first name ever since the dance, and he'd rather be with her than with Gaye. There's also Calliope's actual boyfriend George Hymen (Burns), who would rather avoid she check his measurements to find her Apollo, and the stagehand (Ben Blue) who tries to chase new student Daisy Scholggenheimer (Martha Raye), but has a hard time avoiding the fists she's been trained to use in order to ward off men. They all end up putting together a minstrel show in support of the hotel, and to show Hercules and Carola that true "perfection" is in the eye of the beholder.

The Song and Dance: While the story isn't much, even for a Paramount college musical, some of the individual performances do have merit. Jack Benny has fun firing off some hilarious lines, while Raye and her fists do even better playing off the adorably bewildered Blue. Boland and Dove are befuddled riots as the duo with more wealth than brains who actually believe his ridiculous theories. Allen and Burns have a blast too, especially when Gracie attempts to pair off everyone!

The Numbers: We open under the credits with everyone performing "The Sweetheart Waltz" at that dance. The California Collegians Glee club sings "The Maine Stein Song" on board the train going to the resort. Dick and Sylvia really get into their cute "A Rhyme for Love" tap routine at the back of the train. Bowster even joins in briefly near the end. Daisy wonders "So What?" when asked about men. Bowster also gets to conduct the Collegians singing "Hail! Hail! The Gang's All Here" and plays (or tries to play) "Love In Bloom" during the minstrel show. 

The ballad "Enchanted (I Love You)," performed by Sylvia and Dick with the chorus, is the big ballad in the minstrel show. Calliope, Ben, and George get into lavish colonial garb for an attempt at what they think is a dainty dance to the "Minuet In G." Martha Raye gets more into her blackface routine to "Who's That Knocking at My Heart?" with the Collegians. 

What I Don't Like: Where to start with this one? How about eugenics has largely been discredited since 1936, making Dove's theories look even sillier now than they likely did then. Or how dull Erikson and Hunt are compared to all the loonies around them. There's also the finale revolving around a minstrel show. In 1936, it was quaint nostalgia from a rosy past. Nowadays, the blackface alone may make the final 20 minutes a slog for many people. Or the songs are cute but nothing special, with only the wordplay on "A Rhyme for Love" being even a mild stand-out. Or Raye and Blue seeming to have come from another world entire; Blue is dropped into the second half with little rhyme or reason.

The Big Finale: Only for the most ardent fans of the star comedians. 

Home Media: Once again, this can currently only be found on YouTube (admittedly in a decent copy taken from a TCM showing). 

YouTube

Back to School Again - She Loves Me Not

Paramount, 1934

Starring Bing Crosby, Miriam Hopkins, Kitty Carlisle, and Edward J. Nugent

Directed by Benjamin Glazer

Music and Lyrics by various

Let's head west to Princeton, New Jersey for our next school story. School musicals vanished during 1930, along with other forms of the genre. They too would make a comeback in the mid-30's, though they largely tended to be smaller in scale than the Busby Berkeley dance spectaculars that helped revive the genre. Bing Crosby also rose to prominence around 1933 as he became a popular singer and favorite of women in particular. He was fast becoming one of Paramount's top draws, mostly specializing in small-scale romantic comedies with music like this charming comedy. How does this story of two Princeton students who hide a dancer from gangsters look nowadays? Let's begin as the bell tower of Princeton is contrasted with dancer Curly Flagg (Hopkins) and her routine in a skimpy outfit and find out...

The Story: After Curly witnesses a gangland murder, she flees, with Princeton being the furthest she can afford to go. She ends up in the dorm room of student Paul Lawton (Crosby). He sends her to his buddy Buzz Jones (Nugent), who suggests dressing her as a student and hiding her in plain sight. They cut her hair and give her men's clothing. Paul suggests she get a job with Buzz's movie owner father to support herself.

This turns into her story being leaked to the press in increasingly wild fashion, with the movie men making it look like she's an innocent girl who was taken in by men who wanted to do wrong by her. This upsets both Dean Mercer, the head of Princeton (Henry Stephenson) and his daughter Midge (Kitty Carlisle) who truly loves Paul, not to mention Paul's angry fiancee Frances (Judith Allen). It isn't until Buzz and Paul resign from the school that Curly realizes the trouble she caused...and everyone discovers the gangsters are still on her trail.

The Song and Dance: Charming small-scale school tale with a hilarious premise. Hopkins is the stand-out here. She's straightforward no matter what, whether she's running from the cops, wailing because of the loss of her hair, or doing a tap dance in slippers. Her vivacious heat is a marked contrast to Carlisle, who manages to be both warm and imperious, often in the same moment. Her sweet performance of the hit "Love In Bloom" with Crosby is a major highlight.

The Numbers: We start things off with a Princeton choir singing "Old Nassau" over a shot of a bell in a tower...which takes us into our first number under the credits. Curly, in her skimpy shorts and huge bow top, sings "Put a Little Rhythm Into Everything You Do," finishing right before the gangsters commit murder. She also attempts a tap number in slippers to "Cocktails for Two" after Paul takes her in, and she gets drunk on gin when they cut her hair. Paul and Midge duet on the hit ballad "Love In Bloom" and the jauntier "Straight from the Shoulder." Later on, Paul says "I'm Hummin', I'm Whistlin', I'm Singin'."

Trivia: The song "Love In Bloom" is more associated today with comedian Jack Benny, who used it as his theme song for years.

Would be remade twice, as True to the Army in 1943 and How to Be Very, Very Popular in 1955. 

What I Don't Like: Why was this set at Princeton? The guys are barely shown in school and are never seen studying. Not to mention, there's the problem of them being way too old for college students again and pretty interchangeable. Paul is, frankly, a bit of pill, and is pretty dull for one of Bing's characters. It's interesting too that he ends up with Carlisle, not Hopkins, with whom he really has more chemistry anyway.

The Big Finale: Not Bing's best film, but a cute enough way to pass an hour and a half if you're a huge fan of him or the leading ladies.

Home Media: Which makes it just as well that the only way you can currently find this one is on YouTube in a copy with Portuguese subtitles. 

YouTube 

Back to School Again - So This Is College

MGM, 1929

Starring Robert Montgomery, Sally Starr, Elliot Nugent, and Cliff Edwards

Directed by Sam Wood

Music and Lyrics by various

First of all, Musical Dreams Movie Reviews will be on hiatus from September 27th through October 5th for vacation. I'll be doing an extra review every week this month to make up for the ones I'll miss then. 

That said, we're going back to school this week with our first three reviews. School-set musicals go much further back than most people realize. College students were cheering football heroes and tossing water balloons on their friends in the silent era. Sound gave dimension to the pep rallies and school dances, and indeed the late 20's and early 30's saw a wave of college-set musicals. Prompted by the success of Good News on Broadway, the studios capitalized on their popularity with movies like this one, featuring two of the most unlikely collegiates in the history of film. How does college life in 1929 look almost a hundred years later? Let's begin with the arrival of Eddie (Nugent) joining the high-spirited pranks at real-life college USC, and find out...

The Story: Football heroes Eddie and Biff (Montgomery) swear that nothing will ever break up their life-long friendship, including women. This changes very quickly when co-ed Babs (Starr) dances into their lives. Their pranks as they attempt to keep the other from seeing her start out as harmless, but eventually come close to rupturing their friendship and their football prowess. Eddie initially steps aside when he discovers that Biff wants to marry Babs, but then they learn the truth about her at the big game...and finally come to the conclusion that being pals and good sports is more important than any girl. 

The Song and Dance: Nice to know some things haven't changed on college campuses in almost 100 years. The wild dances, the water in the bags gag in the beginning, the football obsession...yeah, that's stuff you can still see kids doing. Cliff Edwards handles the majority of the musical chores as the campus musician Windy. Starr is so adorable as Sally, you can understand why the two nearly give up their football careers for her. MGM spared no expense on this one. We have glittering low-slung 20's flapper outfits for the ladies, letter sweaters and tuxes for the guys, and shooting on the real-life USC campus (including real footage of an actual college game in the end). 

The Numbers: We open with the guys singing their school song "Cardinal and Gold" as Eddie arrives. Cliff Edwards sings about those "College Days" with the students later, and the students say they'll stay together "Until the End." Starr joins Edwards to sing about those "Campus Capers." Biff initially admits to Babs that "I Don't Want Your Kisses If I Can't Have Your Love." Eddie picks it up later, then we hear it at the prom. Speaking of the prom, Windy sings a whole number about how important it is to the students, "Sophomore Prom." The students claim they'll "Fight On!" at the pep rally. We get a medley of traditional songs performed by the students at the rally as well, including "How Dry I Am," "There's No Place Like Home," "Ring Around the Rosie," and "Hail! Hail! The Gang's All Here."

What I Don't Like: First of all, this really isn't all that different from dozens of school musicals that came after it, from College Humor to High School Musical. All the attendant school cliches run just as hot and heavy here, though it is kind of refreshing that neither Biff nor Eddie end up with Babs in the end. It's their relationship that really matters. Second, Starr is probably the only actor who is even remotely close to the right age for college. Montgomery, though not a horrible singer, is really uncomfortable in a musical, too, and Edwards is basically there for the songs and has little to do otherwise. Not to mention, this is an early talkie. There are stretches where people are just standing and talking.

The Big Finale: Cute if you're a fan of early talkie or pre-code musicals, nothing you really need to go out of your way to see otherwise. 

Home Media: DVD only via the Warner Archives.

DVD

Rock Rock Rock!

Distributor's Corporation of America, 1956

Starring Tuesday Weld, Fran Manfred, Teddy Randazzo, and Jacqueline Kerr

Directed by Will Price

Music and Lyrics by various

This week, we dance into the end of summer with two 50's B-movies featuring sterling examples of early rock acts. Most "rock" movies from the early years of the genre were standard programmers with rock numbers from acts big and small tossed into a barely-there plot. This may be the major example of that genre. How does the story of a teen who learns a valuable lesson in money management while trying to buy a dress for a dance look today? Let's begin at the local malt shop, as sweet teen Dori Graham (Weld) talks to her friend Arabella (Manfred) about their school's upcoming prom and find out...

The Story: Dori's father (Jack Collins) is tired of his daughter spending all her allowance on frivolities and then begging for more, so he cuts off her charge accounts in order to teach her the value of a dollar. This becomes a problem when she wants to buy a strapless evening gown for prom, so she can be glamorous like new girl Gloria Barker (Kerr). Gloria has designs on her boyfriend Tommy Rogers (Randazzo), especially after he wins Alan Freed's (Himself) TV talent contest. Her father gives her 15 dollars and says she can earn the rest. After going to her local bank, she gets the idea she can just have Arabella loan her 15 dollars, then give it to Gloria to buy a dress and keep the dress as collateral. Trouble is, Dori not only doesn't know anything about how banks or money work, but Gloria has no intention of giving up either the dress or her claim on Tommy's heart.

The Song and Dance: And the song and dance, along with those nifty prom gowns the girls scrimped and saved for, are really the only saving graces here. If you're a fan of 50's rock, have I got a treat for you. You get not only legends like Chuck Barry, the Flamingos, and Frankie Lymon and the Teenagers, but groups who are less well-known today like Johnny Burnette Trio and the Moonglows, too. The real Alan Reed even gives us an idea of what made his early shows such a smash. It's a real time capsule of when rock was just starting to make waves.

The Numbers: We hear the title number twice, over the credits during shots of bands and kids dancing, and later at the prom near the end, both times performed by Jimmy Cavello and His House Rockers.. Connie Francis dubs Weld for her ballad "I Haven't Got a Sweetheart" at the malt shop in the opening and the more heart-rendering "Little Blue Wren" after Dori thinks Tommy's dumped her. Tommy sings "The Things Your Heart Needs" at school, and later gets "Thanks to You" at the talent show and "Won't You Give Me a Chance?" at the dance.

Ivy Schulman is supposed to be someone's kid sister, but she ends up singing (rather creepily) about how she wants to "Rock, Pretty Baby." Alan Freed is heard twice, doing "Rock and Roll Boogie" on the talent show and in the finale, performing "Right Now, Right Now." The Flamningos get "Would I Be Crying?" at the TV show. The Three Chuckles get the big "We're Gonna Rock Tonight" with Randazzo in the finale. Frankie Lymon and his groups have two numbers at the prom, "I'm Not a Juvenile Delinquent" and "Baby Baby." The Moonglows get "Over and Over Again." The Johnny Burdette Trio sing "Lonesome Train."

What I Don't Like: The plot and the actors are bland and really very silly. Dori is so impossibly naive and stupid, she believes every word Gloria tells her about Tommy and has no idea how to even figure out 1 percent of something. It's painfully obvious this was a B-film. The sets are minimalistic, and the only lavish costumes are at the prom. The only reason this one exists is for that music.

The Big Finale: And that's the only reason to see this one today. This is for huge fans of early rock only. Everyone else would be better off looking for the recordings made by these groups and ignoring this.

Home Media: It's in the public domain, so it's easily found on DVD and online.

DVD

Tubi

Mr. Music

Paramount, 1950

Starring Bing Crosby, Nancy Olsen, Charles Coburn, and Ruth Hussey

Directed by Richard Haydn 

Music by Jimmy Van Heusen; Lyrics by Johnny Burke

We move from the early spring holidays to the busier late spring and early summer season with our reviews this week, kicking off with two of Bing Crosby's lesser-known vehicles from 1950. Our first is based on the 1935 Broadway comedy Accent On Youth, where an older playwright fell for his younger secretary. It wasn't much of a stretch to turn the playwright into a songwriter and tailor it to Crosby's laid-back persona. How well does he work in this all-star comedy that also includes several big cameos at the end? Let's begin with the announcement that producer Alex Conway (Coburn) is going to produce Paul Merrick's (Crosby) first musical in three years and find out...

The Story: Alex and Paul visit Paul's old alma mater Lawford College, where they're putting on one of his older shows. The school's no-nonsense valedictorian Katherine Holbrook (Olsen) demands that he adds a phrase about her boyfriend and champion athlete Jeff Blake (Robert Stack) in one of his songs. Paul's more comfortable joining in on the production. 

Worried that Paul will spend more time on the golf course than working, Alex hires Kate as his secretary to keep him on track. Paul would rather lavish money on his girlfriend Lorna Mavis (Hussey). Lorna finally decides she prefers someone who actually has the money to spend and leaves Paul for millionaire Tippy Carpenter (Donald Woods), the show's backer. After Jeff arrives, Paul tries to get Kate interested in Jeff, but she prefers more worldly Paul. 

Paul tries to push her towards Jeff again when Lorna returns, but then Kate learns that Tippy pulls his money from the show. Kate's Aunt Amy (Ida Moore) tries to interest her wealthy and eccentric friend Jerome Thisbee (Haydn) in being the back, while the Friar's Club and an all-star array of Hollywood luminaries stage it for a benefit. Kate is still ready to run, but "Mr. Music" may still have some surprises up his sleeve, especially when Lorna realizes she really does love money more than him.

The Song and Dance: With a story that pedestrian, the song and some decent performances are the only saving graces here. Half the reason to see this is for those cameos at the end, including Dorothy Kirsten and some very funny lines from Groucho Marx. The other is the supporting cast. Moore is fun as the dotty old dear who knows her niece's heart better than the girl does, while Tom Ewell has some good moments as Paul's valet and chauffeur who doesn't appreciate his boss calling him "Cupcake." Olsen makes for a nice strong-willed college student, too.

The Numbers: Our first big routine is "Once More the Blue and White." Paul joins in Lawford's school song, before he realizes that the kids are actually cheering on Jeff. The students (including a young Norma Zimmer) perform "Milady" in Paul's ancient Viennese-style operetta. Paul comes onstage for "And You'll Be Home." He tells Lorna that she's "High On the List" at a swank nightclub, then reprises it out of pure anger when Kate tells him to sit down and start writing or else. She finally gets a song out of him, "Wouldn't It Be Funny," which he performs to Lorna after she visits his apartment. 

"Accidents Will Happen" turns up twice. Paul sings it to himself on a tape recording as he and Kate work on the instrumentation. He and Dorothy Kirsten reprise it in a big number near the end of the movie, complete with lavish sets. We get a tiny bit of "Wasn't I There?" from Paul before he and Peggy Lee sing the charming "Life Is So Peculiar." Marge and Gower Champion get a nifty routine to it in the apartment afterwards. Paul and Groucho Marx reprise it hilariously near the end of the film, following an equally delightful run-through by the Merry Macs. The chorus gets the title song. 

What I Don't Like: Some cute numbers aside, most of this movie is a crashing bore. I'm not sure what Kate saw in Paul or Jeff. Jeff was obsessed with his track titles and nothing else, while Paul was a jerk who really was too old for her. Stack did make a surprisingly energetic track star, but Crosby didn't seem terribly interested in the whole affair and had no chemistry with Olsen or Hussey. Hussey was even more bored in a thankless and underused other woman role. 

The Big Finale: Honestly, some terrific numbers and the charming "Life Is So Peculiar" aren't enough to offset a dull plot and Crosby's uninterested performance. Skip the movie and see if you can find the "Life Is So Peculiar" sequence and the finale around instead. 

Home Media: And this will be made easier by the fact that currently, the only way you can see this is on a wildly out-of-print video or on YouTube in a washed-out copy with Portuguese subtitles.

YouTube

Sunday School Musical

The Asylum/Faith Films, 2008

Starring Chris Chatman, Candise Lakota, Krystle Connor, and Robert Acinapura

Directed by Rachel Lee Goldberg

Music and Lyrics by various

Even TV movies got direct-to-home-media versions in the 90's and 2000's. The High School Musical films were such a phenomenon in the mid-late 2000's, imitations were probably inevitable. The Asylum usually specialized in Z-grade horror mockbusters (including the infamous Sharknado film franchise), but they branched out into Christian musicals with the creation of their Faith Films imprint. Does this teen religious musical come off better than their campy horror films, or should it be dropped from the roster? Let's begin at a regional church choir competition as two very different teen choirs compete and see...

The Story: Zachary (Chatman) is devastated when his mother (Millena Gay) insists on moving in with her sister Janet (Rae Silva) after she loses her job. She's already transferred him to a new school and new church, to his horror. Both his choir and the one he moved to are going to the church choir finals, but the one he moved to is terrible. Savannah (Lakota) and Miles (Acinapura) lead a group that sings traditional numbers without a hint of harmony or passion. Savannah has her own problems. She's a pastor's daughter who is getting over her mother's death a few months before. She and Zachary become friends after they're paired in cooking class. 

Zachary keeps insisting he doesn't want anything to do with the choir at first, until he finally encourages them to sing in harmony and find more up-to-date material. Not only is his old friend Aundrea (Connor) now jealous, she accuses him of going against his old church. Even worse, his old church is closing down and doesn't have the funds to send them to the finals. Even as his old church snubs him, Zachary still finds a way for everyone to get to the finals...by bringing the two groups together.

The Song and Dance: Some not-bad numbers are pretty much all there are to recommend this. There's a few songs where the kids are clearly enjoying themselves. And at the least, the story isn't as disjointed as the last independent teen Christian musical I reviewed, It's Christmas Again.

The Numbers: Zachary starts things off with his brief rap solo "Beginnings" as he heads to the Hawthorn Community Choir. Hawthorn's fairly dynamic version of "This Light of Mine" couldn't be a greater contrast to Crossroads Christian Choir's dull and badly sung "Come Thou Font." Zach, Audrea, and their friend from the choir do a short rap imitation of Crossroads after the regional competition. Zach has a very, very brief dance routine on the roof where he expresses his anger over the move. He and Aundrea argue over the move to the R&B ballad "In My Shoes." Zachary laments his being caught between two words in "Cross That Bridge." 

Crossroads' boring "All Over Me" in rehearsal doesn't exactly make Zachary feel better about being forced to erase their boards as a punishment. Zachary reminds the choir that the best way of improving is just to do a "Vocal Thing" and enjoy themselves. Miles and Savannah claim "You're Not the Boss" when Miles protests Zachary joining the choir and changing their sound. Crossroads performs a far more impressive "Vision" for church on Sunday. The two groups finally come together as Audrea and Zachary realize they're much "Better With You." At the contest, the Church of the Gospel Youth Club (which has won for three years in a row) does a charming performance of "Praise." Crossroads and Hawthorn can't compete, but they still perform a dynamic "His Eye On the Sparrow" 

What I Don't Like: First of all, none of the kids are remotely likable. Aundrea jumps on Zachary over the move and acts like it was his idea and he's going to be a million miles away. Considering they see each other pretty frequently, he's barely across town. As Savannah points out, Miles is a whiny brat who tries to boss everyone around when he isn't nearly as talented of a pianist or singer as he thinks. Miles accuses Savannah of being the perfect pastor's daughter, but she's not much better than him, blowing up at her father for no reason at all. Zachary is no prize either, given he constantly blows off his studies for choir and rags his mother for a move that doesn't turn out to be that far.

Other than the "Eye On the Sparrow" finale and the kids really getting into that odd "Vocal Thing," nothing here works. The story is a cliche we've seen a billion times before, including in the real High School Musical movies. The new songs were so-so, the sets and cinematography obviously cheap and z-grade. It didn't feel all that religious, either, beyond a few references to God and Savannah's father being a pastor. It could have been set in any two high schools and done any kind of competition without missing a beat. When the kids aren't acting badly to each other, they're just acting the flat script badly period. Not to mention, the finale with who wins is an unrealistic and ridiculous cop-out. 

The Big Finale: Unless you're really, really desperate for a religious musical to show your teens this Holy Week, you can easily skip this.

Home Media: Like most Asylum films, it's easily found on DVD and streaming. It can currently be found for free with commercials at several streaming sites, including The Roku Channel.

DVD

The Roku Channel

Musicals On Streaming - Stargirl

Disney, 2020

Starring Grace VanderWaal, Graham Verchere, Karan Brar, and Darby Stanchfield

Directed by Julia Hart

Music and Lyrics by various

After those two less-than-terrific spring break trips, let's jump to Arizona for a coming-of-age story that has real charm. The young adult novel Stargirl by Jerry Spinetti debuted in 2000. The book's positive and individual protagonist hit such a deep chord, students in Ohio created a Stargirl Society to promote its views. Disney initially optioned the book back in 2015, but they didn't get it out until 2020. How well do they do with the story of a boy who learns about life, love, and being yourself from one very unique young woman? Let's begin with Leo Borlock (Verchere) in his younger years after his father's death, as he and his mother Gloria (Stanchfield) move to Mica, Arizona and find out...

The Story: After Leo is bullied over the porcupine tie his father gave him the first day of school, he becomes determined to be just like anyone else and hide who he is. Someone, however, sends him porcupine ties every year on his birthday. He's still baffled about the gifts in high school when he's playing trumpet in the marching band and helping his friend Kevin (Brar) with his TV show Hot Seat.  He's not the only one trying to hide his personality. Mica High School has never excelled at anything. The football team loses every year, and Kevin always wins the speaking contest.

Enter Stargirl Caraway (VanderWaal), a capricious newcomer who spent most of her life being homeschooled. She wears bright vintage clothing and comes to school with her ukulele and a positive attitude, playing "Happy Birthday" for kids she doesn't even know. Leo is charmed by her, especially after his older paleontologist friend Archie (Giancarlo Esposito) tells him more about her. The rest of the school is wary at first, until she plays her ukulele at a football game and the team actually wins. She becomes the most popular girl at school after that and a good-luck charm for the team. She and Leo even become a couple. 

Her success is short-lived after she goes to the hospital with an injured member of the opposing side during the big championship game. Now all of the kids shun her, and an appearance on Kevin's Hot Seat show only makes things worse. Leo suggests that she act and dress like everyone else. Stargirl tries, but she can't stop being who she is. It takes a special gift and a reminder of his father for Leo to finally understand why Stargirl acts like she does, and why it's so important to be yourself, even if others don't love you for it.

The Song and Dance: What a sweet movie! I'm glad Disney finally got to making this. The kids were a delight, with VanderWaal the stand-out as the upbeat girl who teaches everyone around her that it's not so bad to be one of a kind. There's some gorgeous desert vistas too, filmed in New Mexico. I also appreciate the message of non-conformity, kindness, and sharing one's grief. 

The Numbers: We open with school band practice and our first view of Mica High. Our first real view of Stargirl is of her playing "Happy Birthday" on her ukulele for Leo in the school cafeteria. She definitely gets more of a response than the school band at the football game playing "Be True to Your School" for the crowd. They get so jazzed, the football team plays better. "We Got the Beat" is the first full-on chorus number, as Stargirl joins the cheer squad and the cheerleaders tailor their routine to her moves. 

"Thirteen" by Big Star provides a backdrop for the montage of Stargirl and Leo getting closer and the football team's continued success. "Be True to Your School" gets a chorus reprise for Stargirl and the cheerleaders at the championship game, while Stargirl and Leo do their own version of "Thirteen" at her house afterwards. "I Just Wanna Dance" is the first number as Leo enters the Winter Dance. Stargirl finally convinces him to sing his version of the Cars' "Just What I Needed" in front of the whole school. Stargirl and the kids get so into it, they lead a conga line right out of the school and into rare desert snow. She sings the George Harrison hit "Give Me Love (Give Me Peace On Earth)" and her own "Today and Tomorrow" over the credits.

What I Don't Like: First of all, from what I gathered, there were a lot of changes from the book. Stargirl stayed in Mica for a year, not a few months, and apparently had even quirkier and more disruptive behavior. It was a basketball game where she comforted the injured player, not football, and she had a girlfriend named Dori along with Leo. It's a barbecue,  not a dance, that the kids attend in the end, and Stargirl insists on all of them doing the Bunny Hop rather than Leo singing "Just What I Needed." Stargirl and Leo's fathers were living; Leo got the original porcupine tie from his uncle. Hillari Kimble was even meaner, and she wasn't related to the boy who had the bike accident.

Second, this is a mass of goofy cliches that runs out of steam a bit in the second half, when the kids start shunning Stargirl and that quirkiness wears out its welcome a bit. The magic Artie talks about is never heavily explored and sometimes seems a bit forced. Many people who read the book complained about the story being watered down, and that maybe Stargirl could have done things that were stranger than singing a Beach Boys number or two.

The Big Finale: I'll be honest, I never read the book. I was in college when it came out. I do know the movie version is a sweet look at a relationship between a boy who lost himself and a girl who knows who she is...and how to make others want to find themselves, too. Highly recommended for teens who are also navigating how to stay true to themselves at school and home and those looking for a unique romance.

Home Media: Surprisingly, it was pulled from Disney Plus back in 2023, despite being made for that platform. It can still be found elsewhere on streaming, including Amazon and YouTube.

Amazon Prime

YouTube

Musicals On Streaming - 13: The Musical

Netflix, 2022

Starring Eli Golden, Gabriella Uhl, Debra Messing, and JD McCrary

Directed by Tamra Davis

Music and Lyrics by Jason Robert Brown

Like The Prom, another recent school musical currently playing on Netflix, this began life as a teen-oriented Broadway show in 2008. In fact, it was Broadway's first show with a cast and band featuring nothing but teenagers. Also like The Prom, it wasn't a success then, but was still optioned for a movie anyway. CBS Films originally planned on producing it, but after they were folded into Paramount in 2019, it moved to Netflix. Let's start in New York, as almost-thirteen-year-old Evan Goldman (Golden) explains his dilemma and see what's different about this school story besides the cast being mostly kids...

The Story: Evan is devastated when his mother Jessica (Messing) and father Joel (Peter Hermann) split up after he's caught seeing a stewardess. Jessica takes Evan to her mother Ruth's (Rhea Pearlman) home in Walkerton, Indiana. Evan spends his summer hanging around with his energetic neighbor Patrice (Uhl) and her wheelchair-bound buddy Archie (Johnathan Lengel). 

He desperately wants football player Brett (JD McCrary) and cheerleader Kendra (Lindsay Blackwell) to come to his Bar Mitzvah party and even agrees to bring the two together for their first kiss at an R-rated slasher flick. Upset at being left out due to the cool kids thinking she's a nerd, Patrice blows the whistle on them. Lucy (Frankie McNellis), Kendra's ambitious best friend, is the one who finally kisses Brett. Evan knows he's made mistakes, but it's his parents who ultimately remind him that mistakes can be fixed and they're not the end of the world.

The Song and Dance: This wound up being very sweet. The kids are uniformly terrific, with Goldman and Uhl the standouts as the kid who just wants to fit in and the girl who is happy being her. I also give them kudos for the wonderfully diverse cast that includes wheelchair-bound Lengel and a story that revolves around an important Jewish ritual that many people might not be familiar with. Some of the adults aren't bad, either. Messing is a lovely, patient mother, and Pearlman is a riot as her sensible mother. 

Favorite Number: We open in New York City with the title song as Ethan explains his parents' divorce and why he doesn't want to leave. Patrice spends their summer showing him "The Lamest Place In the World." Kendra and Brett claim "I've Been Waiting" for their first kiss. Lucy leads the cheerleaders through a lively and well-choreographed routine as she insists on waiting for her "Opportunity" to catch Brett. The kids all sing about seeing the R-rated horror movie "The Bloodmaster" and what that means for them and that they're "Getting Ready" for their movie dates. 

The members of the football team try to tell Brett that the clingy Lucy is "Bad, Bad News" in their own big choreographed number. "It Would Be Funny," laments Evan and his mother, if mistakes didn't hurt so much. "Tell Her" goes from Evan encouraging Brett to apologize to Kendra to all of the kids apologizing to each other. "Evan's Haftorah" begins with him reciting the chant, but becomes "A Little More Homework" as he and the other kids realize they still have a lot of growing up to do. It ends with the kids declaring it's time to create a "Brand New You" at Evan's Bar Mitzvah party.

Trivia: 13 began as a smaller production in Los Angeles in 2007. It finally opened on Broadway in 2008, but couldn't find an audience and barely lasted three months. It didn't make a week on the West End in 2012. It's done far better as a regional and school production, particularly for middle schools with actors in the appropriate age range. 

What I Don't Like: Apparently, this was greatly changed from Broadway. Lucy was a lot meaner - and wasn't redeemed in the end - and Evan finally told Brett off after Lucy spread a rumor that Evan was after Kendra. There were no adults at all, not even Evan's mother, and they stayed with a friend, not his grandmother. A lot of songs were cut, including a song for Evan and the rabbis helping him with his Bar Mitzvah speech, "Being a Geek," Patrice's solo "Good Enough," the song revolving around that cut subplot with Lucy "It Can't Be True," and another that made more of Archie's "Terminal Illness." 

And while I give them credit for the diversity and spotlighting the Jewish faith, a lot of this is mired in school and coming-of-age cliches. It's nothing you haven't seen in similar Disney and Nickelodeon movie musicals featuring all or nearly-all-teen casts. The idea of an all-teen cast was more novel in 2008 than it was over 15 years later after all those Disney Channel originals came and went, too.

The Big Finale: Lively school tale with great music and a diverse cast is worth checking out for real-life thirteen-year-olds and their parents as they return to school and try to figure out their place in the world.

Home Media: This is a Netflix exclusive at the moment.

Netflix

Back to School Again - Pigskin Parade

20th Century Fox, 1936

Starring Patsy Kelly, Jack Haley, Stuart Irwin, and Judy Garland

Directed by David Butler

Music by Lew Pollack; Lyrics by Sidney D. Mitchell

We move west to Texas for our next college football musical. There's a lot more history in this one than you might think. This was Judy Garland's first major role, on loan to Fox from MGM, and one of Betty Grable's bigger roles at the time. Irwin had been specializing in big goofy guys since the time of Sweetie; this wound up being one of his rare starting roles. Patsy Kelly was coming from shorts, Jack Haley from his success in the Shirley Temple vehicle Poor Little Rich Girl. How do they fare as married coaches who recruit a talented hillbilly to play against Yale? Let's start at Yale as the professors there try to decide who should play their football team in a big charity game and find out...

The Story: One of their younger assistants accidentally invites Texas State University to play them. They haven't won a game in years, but the students believe their luck is changing when former high school coach Slug Winters (Haley) and his wife Bessie (Patsy Kelly). Bessie is really the one who knows something about football, and it's her suggestions that really begin to whip the team into shape.

Just as it looks like the team might have a chance against Yale, their quarterback Biff Bentley (Fred Kohler Jr.) breaks his leg. Desperate for a replacement, Bessie and Slug discover a shy hillbilly named Amos (Erwin) who can throw a watermelon farther than the pros. They bring him and his sister Sairy (Garland) to Texas State U under assumed names. Amos falls hard for co-ed Sally Saxon (Arline Judge), to the frustration of her wealthy boyfriend Mortimer (Grady Sutton). Amos almost leaves when he thinks Sally isn't interested in him, but the Winters convince him to stay for the Yale game. Inclement conditions could prevent Texas State from winning, until Bessie remembers how Amos likes to feel the earth between his toes...

The Song and Dance: Adorable football musical makes the most of its goofy premise with a terrific cast and some lively numbers. Irwin made such a delightfully sweet hillbilly, he got a nod for Best Supporting Actor in 1937. Garland already shines in her first movie, especially in her three big numbers. She's such an enthusiastic kid, you can't liking her. The movie really belongs to Kelly and Haley, and they, pardon the football pun, run with the ball. Kelly in particular is a blast as one of the few female coaches in filmdom. 

Favorite Number: We don't get our first number until almost 15 minutes in, but it's the students singing Texas State's rousing alma mater. Tony Martin, in one of his earliest roles, joins Dixie Dunbar for "You're Slightly Terrific" at the school pep rally, with Dixie leading the students in an energetic dance routine. The Yacht Boys get their first of many numbers at the rally with the adorably silly "Woo Woo!" Three lovely ladies join them at the homecoming dance for "We'd Rather Be In College," much to their surprise! They also lead campus radical Elisha Cook Jr. through "Down With Everything" as they try to get him arrested so Amos can use his name.

Judy finally gets to show what she can do with the dance number "The Balboa" to earn enough for the trip to Yale. Dixie Dunbar and Betty Grable lead the wild arms-and-legs two-step. Slug tries to seduce Sally back into Amos' arms with "You Do the Darnedest Things, Baby." Judy really makes the crowds at the train station to see the team off go crazy with her vivacious "The Texas Tornado." She also gets "It's Love I'm After" with a chorus of cowboys before the game. The Yacht Boys return near the end of the game...but they're embarrassed to perform "We Brought the Texas Sunshine Here With Us" during halftime in a major blizzard. The film ends with Texas State's band and the entire cast joyfully reprising "The Texas Tornado."

Trivia: Filming was reportedly a nightmare. A misfired gun in the crowd sequence towards the end sent one student extra to the hospital and injured three others, students sprained their ankles and hurt their necks during the fast-paced marching scene, and there was a fire on the train station set that the cast had to help put out. 

"It's Love I'm After" was originally intended for Betty Grable and Johnny Downs, but their version was cut. Judy also had a number dropped from the film, "Hold That Bulldog," though it is mentioned in the credits. The audio for "Love I'm After" survives, but "Hold That Bulldog" is completely gone. 

What I Don't Like: This is riddled with cliches of the highest order. They're better-presented than in Sweetie, but it still isn't anything you haven't seen before. It's Sweetie crossed with the slobs vs snobs comedies of the 1980's and the hillbilly B musicals of the 60's. It also doesn't treat campus protests and radicals any better than C'mon, Let's Live a Little did almost 30 years later. Though Cook Jr.'s character isn't a villain, he's blown off and treated as a joke by the other students. And if you're looking for more from Grable, you're going to be disappointed. She's limited to a barely-there love interest role and her part in "The Balboa."

The Big Finale: This wound up being a pleasant surprise. Judy Garland's first musical doesn't reinvent the game, but it is a lovely way to spend an hour and a half if you're a fan of her or any of the stars or want to see a good school-set movie. 

Home Media: The Fox Marquee Musicals DVD is hard to find, but it may turn up used. You're better off streaming this one. 

DVD

Amazon Prime

Back to School Again - Horse Feathers

Paramount, 1932

Starring The Marx Brothers, Thelma Todd, and David Landau

Directed by Norman Z. McLeod

Music by Harry Ruby; Lyrics by Bert Kalmar

We skip ahead a few years for our second college football tale featuring three of the least-likely players in film history. The Marx Brothers were at the top of the movie heap when this debuted. Their first three films were critical and financial successes, and this one would continue that streak. Having parodied land speculation, the art world, and cruise ships and their wealthy clientele in their first three films, they took on no less than higher education in the fourth. How well do they do spoofing college sports cliches that continue to turn up to this day? Let's begin as the new dean Professor Wagstaff (Groucho) arrives at Huxley College and find out...

The Story: Wagstaff's son Frank (Zeppo) convinces his father to hire two professional football players to bump up the roster on Huxley's losing team. He actually ends up hiring ice seller Bavarelli (Chico) and dog catcher Pinky (Harpo) at a speakeasy to help Huxley defeat their rival Darwin University. College widow Connie Bailey (Todd) has been seeing Frank, but she ends up attempting to seduce all the other three as well. After Wagstaff realizes he's hired the wrong guys, he sends Bavarelli and Pinky to kidnap the players. The players end up stealing their clothes and locking them in, but they manage to escape in time for the wildest "big game" on record.

Oh, and you CAN burn a candle at both ends. And the password is always "swordfish." 

The Song and Dance: The Marx Brothers' fourth big-screen outing is more than equal to their earlier adventures. The sequences with Harpo, Chico, and Groucho trying to give the password at the speakeasy and them courting Todd are worth the price of admission. Kalmar and Ruby came up with a pretty decent score, too, including the standard "Everyone Says 'I Love You.'" 

This is also one of the few Marx Brothers movies with no young lovers taking away from the main story. Todd's no dewy-eyed ingenue, but a comedy scene-stealer in her own right. Check out her reactions to the Marxes when they each perform "Everyone Says." The wacky football finale is one of the best ending action sequences from any of their movies, including the truly insane "chariot race" in Chico's ice seller cart.

Favorite Number: We open with Groucho explaining his philosophy of life in pretty much everything he did, "Whatever It Is, I'm Against It,"  to the shocked staff and amused students of Huxtley. "I Always Get My Man" is his number with Zeppo and the students as his attempts teach a biology class degenerate into chaos. (Making this spoof one of the few vintage college movies to actually spend time in a classroom.) Chico plays "Collegiate" and his own "I'm Daffy Over You" on the piano, while Harpo gets a lovely harp solo.

"Everyone Says I Love You" starts off fairly normal, with Zeppo singing the sweet number to Todd to explain how much he likes her. Things get a lot weirder when each of his brothers try to serenade Todd with it in their own way. It becomes Harpo's harp solo and a comic dialect number for Chico. Groucho gives her the sarcastic version in a rowboat on a lake (while she's rowing).

Trivia: Like Animal Crackers, this was edited to bring it up to the standards of the Production Code in 1935. Among the missing bits are more of the sequence in Connie's apartment and a Harpo gag with a grapefruit in the speakeasy scene. A far more savage ending that featured the Marxes playing cards while Huxtley burned to the ground was filmed but not used. 

Chico Marx got into a car accident during filming, which is why he can be seen limping in several sequences and is frequently shown sitting down. 

The term "college widow" showed up a lot in these early school-set musicals. They were young women who hung around colleges trying to pick up young men, as Connie does with Frank here.

What I Don't Like: As with most of the Marx Brothers films, some of the gags have dated better than others. Many viewers nowadays may not even be aware of what a speakeasy or a college widow were. The supporting cast is barely there. It's the Brothers and Todd all the way, with a little interference from villainous Landau. If you're not into the Brothers and their brand of comedy, this is probably not the place for you. 

The Big Finale: Marx Brothers fans will find a great deal to enjoy in this farcical take on football and higher education. 

Home Media: Not currently streaming, but fairly easy to find on disc, solo and as part of a collection with the other Paramount Marx Brothers movies. 

DVD

DVD - The Marx Brothers Silver Screen Collection

Blu-Ray - The Marx Brothers Silver Screen Collection

Back to School Again - Sweetie (1929)

Paramount, 1929

Starring Nancy Carroll, Stanley Smith, Helen Kane, and Jack Oakie

Directed by Frank Tuttle

Music by Richard Whiting; Lyrics by George Marion Jr.

First of all, Musical Dreams Movie Reviews is going on vacation hiatus from September 22nd through the 30th. Reviews will resume October 1st. To make up for that, you'll be getting an extra review on Wednesday every week for the rest of the month.

Second, we kick off Back to School week with one of the oldest college-related film musicals. Movies with college settings go back to the silent era, complete with football games, homecoming dances, strict deans, and flappers chasing only slightly reluctant class presidents. College musicals had become especially popular in the late 20's, thanks to the success of the Broadway show Good News. This is Paramount's answer to that rush. How does the story of a chorus girl who inherits a university look nowadays? Let's enter the campuses of The Pellham School and Miss Twill's School for Girls in North Carolina and find out...

The Story: Barbara Pell (Carroll) is shocked when she inherits Pellham from a deceased uncle. Her former boyfriend Biff Bentley (Smith) was going to marry her, but he opted to stay at Pellham and finish out the football season instead. He's one of the reasons they're having their best season ever. Barbara's furious with him. She quit her Broadway job to be with him and was dumped back in the chorus when he left her. 

She first gives him tests on football days, then claims she'll sell the college to their rival school and let him knock it down. Even her Broadway buddy Tap-Tap Thompson (Oakie) knows that's pushing things too far. While Biff tries to prove to Barbara that she means as much to him as football does, Miss Twill's student Helen Fry (Kane) is up trees shooting boys in the rear, especially Biff's fellow football player Axel Bronstrup (Stuart Erwin). 

The Song and Dance: Carroll and the supporting cast are the standouts here. Kane shows the feisty cooing that made her the inspiration for Betty Boop, and Oakie has a fine time hamming it up as the dancer who ends up deciding he might actually like higher education. Carroll also has some good moments, especially early-on when she drops Biff after he claims he wants to finish the season. Paramount really jumped into this one, with lovely gowns and suits for the homecoming dance and a genuine field for the guys to play that all-important game on in the end. It honesty moves pretty fast for an early talkie film, with more vitality than most of them.

Favorite Number: Our first song is "Bear Down, Pellham." This sentimental fight song is what convinces Biff to stay at school and on the football team, after he hears his fellow team members singing it, looks into a mirror, and remembers what it feels like to be a football hero. Jack Oakie and the chorus girls have an instrumental tap routine at a Broadway theater after Barbara returns to the chorus that she's having a hard time keeping up with. 

Biff and Barbara perform the ballad "My Sweeter Than Sweet" on a simple piano as the school decorates for the homecoming dance. Helen boop-oop-a-doops through the only standard from this score, "He's So Unusual," looking every inch like a live-action Betty Boop. She and Oakie teach the kids decorating the lively routine "The Prep Step" for the dance. Oakie sings the goofy Al Jolson parody "Alma Mammy" at the school dance. All of the kids eventually join in for the closest thing this gets to a big dance routine. Helen tries to explain to Erwin when he climbs a ladder to her window that "I Think You'll Like It." The students briefly reprise "Alma Mammy" at the big game in very strange blackface masks that are probably supposed to represent Jolson. 

What I Don't Like: First of all, Smith is so dull, especially compared to hams like Kane and Oakie, that you wonder why Barbara wanted revenge on him to begin with. Though she does eventually rescind on her plans when she realizes how important football is to the school, Barbara's scheme to shut down an entire college just because her boyfriend dumped her for 8 months seems annoyingly petty. 

And yeah, this is an early talkie school musical. The story is cliched other than the angle of Barbara inheriting the school, only "He's So Unusual" stands out among the songs, and though the copy currently on YouTube is in surprisingly decent shape for the era, it still occasionally slows down and shows scenes of people sitting and talking.

The Big Finale: Mainly for fans of Carroll, Kane, Oakie, or the movies of the pre-Code late 20's and early 30's. 

Home Media: To my knowledge, this can only be found at YouTube at the moment, but the copy is in surprisingly decent shape.

YouTube

C'mon, Let's Live a Little

Paramount, 1967

Starring Bobby Vee, Jackie DeShannon, Eddie Hodges, and John Ireland

Directed by David Butler

Music and Lyrics by Don Crawford

Paramount made one last stab at beach parties in 1967, just as the surf music wave was cresting. That could be why this one has a topical angle that mostly took it off the beaches and onto a college campus. Colleges across the US were rife with protests as students rallied for civil rights, women's rights, and their own right to speak freely and against the war in Vietnam. It's also a little bit more action-packed than most of these films, with car wrecks and brawls in and out of school. How does all this look now, as more college students one again stage protests and question the rules of society? Let's begin with tough little cookie Judy Grant (DeShannon) who ends up in that car wreck and find out...

The Story: Arkansas hillbilly singer Jesse Crawford (Vee) rescues Judy from the burning car. Her father (Russ Conway) is the dean of students at a local college. He's so grateful, he lets Jesse go to school for free. Jesse befriends nerdy inventor Eddie Stewart (Eddie Hodges), who introduces him to his singing group. Eddie's hoping to beat school intellectual Rego (Ireland) for school president, but Rego has his own ideas of who should be in charge. He holds a rally against the dean, convincing Jesse and Eddie's group to sing for the show. Judy's horrified, until Jesse finally explains that he had no idea what the rally was about, and Judy reminds Rego that there's more to life and love than revolution.

The Song and Dance: I give them a little credit on this one. This is the only Beach Party imitation that got anywhere near the campus radicalism that was much-discussed at the time. It does give you the idea of how scared many adults were of the revolutions happening on colleges around the country in the late 60's and makes for a fairly original twist. At the very least, it makes a bit more sense than teens gyrating on a beach. 

Favorite Number: Our first number is Vee's lovely "What Fools This Mortal Be" with Eddie's group, though most of the second half is drowned out by Rego and Judy's brother Tim (Mark Evans) deciding to add him to their big protest rally. Giggly Bee Bee Vendermeer (Suzie Kaye), Tim's girlfriend who flirts with every guy around, performs the title number with a male combo at a local club. Vee is encouraged to join Kaye and slinky dancers for the swinging "Instant Girl." 

Jesse's hillbilly relatives drive to college singing "Way Back Home" as they wonder about all the differences between their farm and the campus. Jesse sings "Over and Over" while he and Judy discuss their relationship. Eddie and his band rehearse the dance song "Let's Go-Go" at their dorm rooms before the rally. Jesse and Judy really get into their catchy duet "Back-Talk" at the rally, before Rego comes out with his big speeches and annoys the dean and the students alike. We end with black duet The Pair jamming with "Tonight's the Night" at the end of the rally. 

Trivia: Last movie for director David Butler, who had been doing fluffy musicals and romantic comedies like this one since 1927. 

Look for future rock star Kim Carnes as one of Judy's friends on campus. 

What I Don't Like: Even in the truncated version I saw on YouTube, it's still clear that this hasn't dated well at all. In 1967, most college students would have been far more likely to take those protests seriously, and they sure as heck would today. DeShannon comes off a little bit better than in Surf Party three years earlier, but Vee has no chemistry with her and can't act worth a darn and everyone else is either annoying or too goofy. Even Patsy Kelly as Dean Grant's housekeeper can't do much with the witless material she has to work with. The sets and costumes look as cheap as they likely are. We barely even get on the beach, much less have parties. 

The Big Finale: Paramount seems to have wiped out with their attempts to ape AIP. Only for the most ardent fans of Vee or DeShannon, or those who remember seeing these movies at the drive-in or late-night cable.

Home Media: Currently only available in truncated copies from those late-night cable showings on YouTube and the Internet Archive that are missing two of DeShannon's numbers. 

YouTube

Family Fun Saturday - Descendents: The Rise of Red

Disney, 2024

Starring Kylie Cantrall, Malia Baker, Ruby Rose Turner, and Morgan Dudley

Directed by Jennifer Phang

Music and Lyrics by various

I thought Disney was done with this franchise, but never underestimate their obsession with their history and milking a series dry. That said, it's not often they dive into their TV history. Descendents apparently returned last year with an animated short that launched a revival of the series, this time focusing on Cinderella and the citizens of Wonderland. How does this latest visit to the world of Auradon Prep look, especially compared to the films that came before it? Let's begin with Uma (Chiana Anne McClain), daughter of Ursula, as she tells us how she is now principal of Auradon and plans on shaking things up, and find out...

The Story: Red (Cantrall) is the rebellious daughter of the Queen of Hearts (Rita Ora), who embraces her invitation to Auradon as a way to get out from under the thumb of her tyrannical and controlling mother. The Queen, however, uses the invitation as an excuse to stage a coup and take over the school. Red flees and uses a pocket watch given to her by Maddox (Leonardo Nam), the son of the Mad Hatter, to go back in time when her mother and Cinderella (Brandy) attended the school. Chloe (Baker) accidentally gets caught up in the watch's magic, and after arguing over the watch, eventually decide to work together to save their mothers.

Turns out not only did their mothers know each other when the school was called Merlin Academy, but Bridget (Turner) and Ella (Dudley) were best friends. Bridget was a perky go-getter who wanted to be friends with everyone, while Ella is more skeptical about royalty and those who abuse their privileges. Bridget inadvertently gets on the bad side of school bully Uliana (Dara Renee) when she steals her flamingo cupcakes and turns into a flamingo, causing her to plan a major prank on her at the school dance. Chloe and Red have to figure out how prevent that prank from happening, before any worse damage is done in the past and the present.

The Song and Dance: I give them credit for at least trying for something a little different. This feels like a fairy tale Back to the Future as the girls head to the past and see how different their mothers were when they went to Merlin Academy, as it was called then. Cantrell and Baker have a great time as the unruly Red who is determined to prove she's nothing like her dominating mother and sweet Chloe, who is shocked to discover her mother wasn't always royalty or perfect. Also great to see less-discussed Disney properties like Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cinderella and The Sword and the Stone be included in one of their crossovers. The costumes remain colorful, bright, and gorgeous, with amazing gowns for the moms and tight jackets and leggings for their daughters. 

(Also, kudos to them for their heartfelt acknowledgement of one of the original characters, Carlos, and the actor who played him. Cameron Boyce died of a seizure shortly before the release of Descendents 3, and the short tribute was very sweet and thoughtful.) 

Favorite Number: "Red" destroys everything about her mother in her introductory number. Cinderella sings "So This Is Love" briefly from the original Disney animated film with the Prince as they give Chloe a very special gift. The Queen of Hearts insists that "Love Ain't It" when she stages her coup and takes over the school. The two girls claim it's the "Fight of Our Lives" as Chloe and Red fight over the watch after the arrive at Merlin Academy in a dynamic rap routine. Bridget tells everyone that "Life Is Sweeter (Wherever You Are)" as she hands around her pink flamingo cupcakes to the students and Uliana and her villains introduce themselves. 

After her accidental humiliation, Uliana vows the "Perfect Revenge" on Bridget. Bridget, for her part, is totally ignorant as she briefly shows off her new dance for the Castlecoming Dance, "Shuffle of Love," to the duo. Ella insists that one should "Get Your Hands Dirty" and make their own choice to Chloe when she wonders if she should help Red steal the cookbook from Merlin. We end with a reprise of "Life Is Sweeter"  as everyone celebrates Red's arrival at Auradon, and Uma admits that while we have a happy ending now, there could be repercussions from messing with the past in the future...

What I Don't Like: This one starts off fairly strong, with improved special effects and mostly decent performances...but like Lady and the Tramp II, the finale is a disappointment. After all the build-up, they don't show the all-important Castlecoming Dance or how Ella and Prince Charming fell in love. I know they're trying to set up a sequel, but it makes the end of this movie feel like less of an end and more like the movie is just stopping for a dance party. Wish it could have made more use of some of its characters, too, especially the villains, Merlin, and Faye, the original Fairy Godmother. 

A lot of this contradicts the original films. I do appreciate Disney acknowledging Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cinderella, but Brandy and Paolo Montalban don't look anything like the adult Cinderella and Prince Charming from the first three films. And what happened to the villains being banished to the Isle of the Lost? Plus there were Wonderland characters in the original films and cartoons. The movie also awkwardly writes out most of the original characters as traveling in other kingdoms. They could have at least tried to integrate that better, instead of info-dumping that information in the very beginning.

The Big Finale: The Back to the Future twist makes this one of the more interesting Descendants films, but the dull second half makes this mainly for fans of the Disney films it refers to or the intended 8 to 14 audience.

Home Media: It's a Disney Plus exclusive at the moment. 

Disney Plus

Animation Celebration Saturday - Leo

Netflix, 2023

Voices of Adam Sandler, Bill Burr, Cecily Strong, and Rob Schneider

Directed by Robert Marianetti and Robert Smigel

Music and Lyrics by various

Let's celebrate the end of the school year with the second animated movie from comedian Adam Sandler. His first one, Eight Crazy Nights, was so badly received, it took him over 20 years to try another. This time, he went with an original story about a school pet who learns a lesson in aging when he ends up giving advice to an entire fifth-grade class. Does this movie deserve your respect, or should it be dumped in the Everglades? Let's begin with that fifth grade class, as the kids anticipate the school year, and find out...

The Story: Leo the tuatara (Sandler) and Squirtle the Florida box turtle (Burr) have been the pets in a fifth grade classroom at Fort Myers, Florida for years. After he overhears one of the dads mention tutaras only live 75 years, he becomes determined to escape to the Everglades and live out what little he has left of his life. He seizes his chance when the original teacher goes on maternity leave and is replaced by the far stricter Ms. Malkin (Strong). She insists that the kids each take home a class pet for the weekend to teach them responsibility. The kids resist at first, until Leo reveals he can talk and gives them advice on how to deal with their problems. 

Soon, all of the kids are clamoring to take Leo home and have him help them...until a jealous Squirtle spills the beans about Leo's ability to talk. Ms. Malkin takes him home when they refuse to, and reveals to Leo why she's so mean to them. She does manage to encourage them to win a big trip at the history fair, but she dumps Leo in the Everglades instead of admitting it was his idea. It's Squirtle who uses the overprotective drone owned by one of the kids to tell them what's really going on, and remind them that sometimes, all you need is a supportive ear and a little advice from an elder. 

The Animation: Pretty good CGI. Thankfully, it's not as grotesque as Thelma the Unicorn last month. The characters are generally more cute than they are scary, even the alligators and animals in the Everglades. Even Ms. Malkin has a soft, squishy body that slides and glides around. Leo and Squirtle move like their actual species, even with the slightly gross jokes about Leo's regrowing tail and the Squirtle's tattoo getting slung around.

The Song and Dance: The last thing I expected from Adam Sandler was a touching rumination on growing older, listening, and how elders can mentor the next generation. He was hilarious as Leo, especially when encouraging the kids and telling them how special they are. The kids were adorable, Strong was terrific as the grouchy older substitute teacher who has never been able to connect with her students well enough for full teaching, and Burr comes off even better as the turtle who wonders why the kids don't pay attention to him like they do his best friend. Even the songs are catchy and fun.  And really, there should be more animated movies for kids that revolve around how they deal with their elders and what it feels like to grow up and get older. 

Favorite Number: We open with the kids singing about how "Last Year" went, and what they hope for this school year. "Feeling Free" and "Here's to Us" are background numbers as we learn about Leo's desire to see the Everglades and his friendship with Squirtle. Leo gives us the "Lizard's Lament" as he complains about how he'll never get to live his dream. The two teachers insist that "There's a Time" to work and a time to be at home when pregnant.

"The Talking Song" has Leo encouraging chatty Summer (Sunny Sandler) to ask questions instead of rambling on. He tells Eli (Rory Smigel) to write a "Dear Drone" letter and break up with his flying babysitter. Spoiled Jayda (Sadie Sandler) is reminded that she's "Not That Great" as her obnoxious rich father (Jason Alexander) does a Busby Berkeley take off with dancing clocks to "Extra Time." "Instruction" is a montage of the kids learning life lessons from Leo. "Can't Feel My Face" has Cole (Bryant Tardy and Corey J) revealing his childishly high voice...which turns out to be great for a rendition of "Last Christmas" at the school's holiday recital. Leo gently admonishes brainy Mia (Reese Lores) "Don't Cry" as he helps her get to sleep. 

The kids and Ms. Malkin sadly recall how happy they were "When I Was 10" after they believe Leo has betrayed them. Leo reminds Ms. Malkin how "Happy" she was when a favorite teacher encouraged her to learn. We hear "Last Year" again as the kids graduate and Ms. Malkin and the two pets get new assignments. "When It's Us" is heard over the credits as Leo, Ms. Malkin, and Squirtle avoid the feral kindergartners who are now their charges.

What I Don't Like: At times, the movie feels like a cross between the Disney show Recess from the early 2000's and The Magic School Bus. The kids and their problems are nothing new, though them getting advice from an aging pet is certainly an interesting new wrinkle. As per most of Adam Sandler's comedies and the film's audience, the jokes can occasionally be gross bordering on annoying, like where Squirtle's tattoo ended up and what the one class fish is constantly doing. 

The Big Finale: Highly recommended for fans of Sandler who don't think he can do gentle and charming and families looking for a great animated movie appropriate for 8 to 12 year olds. 

Home Media: It's a Netflix exclusive at the moment. 

Netflix

Wild Wild Winter

Universal, 1966

Starring Gary Clarke, Chris Noel, Steve Franken, and Don Edwards

Directed by Lennie Wenrib

Music and Lyrics by various

This is the last of the four Beach Party-style musicals with winter backdrops. By the time Wild Wild Winter made it out for the 1966 ski season, the Beach Party wave had crested. This one comes closer to the originals, in subject matter and comedic tone. Is it just as much fun as the American International entries, or should it be buried in the snow? Let's begin as a narrator extols the virtues of Alpine College and find out...

The Story:  Fraternity brothers Burt (Don Edmonds), Perry (Les Brown Jr.), and Larry (Paul Geary) want to date women from a popular sorority, but it's led by Susan Benchley (Noel), the dean's secretary. Susan has encouraged the ladies to be very choosy about dates. Desperate, they call Ronnie Duke (Clarke), a surfer who has the reputation for dating many women at once. They want him to seduce Susan into letting the girls date again. 

Donnie claims to be a champion skier and the son of a millionaire to impress her. Not only is Susan delighted, but so is Dean Carlton (James Wellman). Carlton needs to come up with three million dollars in back payment by January 31st, or he'll lose Alpine College to gangsters. In an attempt to get the funds off Donnie, he makes him the captain of the ski team. The actual captain and Susan's fiancee, whiny John (Franken), becomes determined to discredit Donnie. When he can't get past him in a skiing race, he calls a private eye (Buck Holland) to find out what his game really is. Donnie's just hoping he can win that money in the big Intercollegiate Skiing Tournament.

The Song and Dance: Along with Ski Party, this is by far the funniest of the four winter resort musicals. There's some fairly cute gags here, especially with what finally gets Donnie to that big race in the end. Clarke a little smarmy, but has enough charm that you can understand why so many girls fall for him. I also like that, with the exception of two very brief scenes at a beach, this movie makes more use of its snowy setting than most of the other winter party musicals. The whole thing hinges on two ski races. There's also far less romance than in the other resort musicals. This one is purely about Clarke, his attempts to show off, and gorgeous Technicolor scenery filmed at a real Lake Tahoe resort.

Favorite Number: We open over the credits with the title song, which mostly consists of the words "snow, snow, wow!" and skiers riding over the mountains...and sometimes falling into it. Our first actual number is on the beach, but Jackie Miller and Gayle Caldwell still sing about how their love is gonna "Snowball." The Beau Brummels get so into their number at the resort, "Just You Wait and See," Donnie regards it as his thinking music and apparently had the group perform it four times. The Astronauts provide Donnie's thinking music after John takes his place with Susan as they describe "A Change of Heart." Duo Dick and Dee Dee sing the uptempo ballad "Heartbeats" after Donnie wins the ski race against John. Jay and the Americans finish things off with "Two of a Kind" as the backdrop to the chorus number in the finale as everyone celebrates saving the college.

What I Don't Like: The script is flimsy and annoying, even by 60's drive-in musical standards. The college subplot is basically "save the school" crossed with "gangster plot from Comden-Green musicals of the 40's and 50's." The boys' attempts to lie their way into the girls' hearts is dated, annoying, and a bit distasteful nowadays. Even the girls and Susan call them on it. Speaking of, Susan is really the only girl we see much of. The other two turn up mainly in the beginning and end and have very little to do. There's so much focus on comedy and Clarke's slightly sleazy attempts to impress Susan, there isn't much room for anyone else's romance. All of the boys are so interchangable and bland, I don't know how any of the girls can tell them apart anyway. 

The Big Finale: Despite some cute gags, this is by far my least-favorite of the four winter resort drive-in musicals. Only if you're a huge fan of 60's drive-in fodder, musicals of the 50's and 60's, or the cast. 

Home Media: As the most obscure of the four winter resort musicals, the only place you can currently find this one is YouTube.

YouTube

Get Yourself a College Girl

MGM, 1964

Starring Mary Ann Mobley, Chris Noel, Joan O'Brien, and Chad Everett

Directed by Sidney Miller

Music and Lyrics by various

This week, we hit the slopes with a pair of drive-in musicals from the early 60's that showcased teens having fun at winter resorts. MGM jumped into the Beach Party pool with this entry, adding former Miss America Mobley and some genuine major musical acts to the story of a female songwriter whose college career is threatened when the heads of the school learns what she writes is rock. How does all this look now? Let's begin with a ballet class at Wyndham College for Women and find out...

The Story: Teresa "Terry" Taylor (Mobley) is furious when her publisher Gary Underwood (Everett) calls the school and exposes her as a songwriter. The school's board of trustees, including Senator Hubert Morrison (Willard Waterman), are shocked at a woman singing so frankly about sexual matters. Terry promises that she and her best friend Sue Ann Mobley (Noel) won't even consider boys while they're on their Christmas break ski vacation. They even bring along their ballet teacher Marge Endicott (O'Brien) as a chaperone.

Of course, that lasts for approximately two days once they arrive at Sun Valley, Idaho. Gary is also at the resort with his French friend Armand (Fabrizio Mioni), and they're determined to win the girls and figure out why Terry rejects men when she writes so well about sex and get her to pose for a sexy painting. Morrison is down for vacation, too, trying to figure out these young people. After he and Terry get caught in a compromising photo, Terry, Gary, and the others gather rock acts for a big political rally to prove that Morrison is more "hip" to the young than everyone thought.

The Song and Dance: I give them credit for a shred of originality. None of the other beach party films end with a political rally, and none of them praise feminism quite this fervently. In fact, it's interesting to hear the women discuss their rights (or lack of them) nearly a full decade before women's liberation became a household word. Mobley is spunky and charming as Terry, who just wants to make it in college on her own terms, and Waterman and Noel have some good moments as the Senator who wonders how this young lady learned so much about sexual matters and the giggly blonde who wants a guy, any guy, no matter what her friend thinks. 

Favorite Number: We open with "The Swinging Set," the film's original title, performed over the credits by Donnie Brooks. The ballet class gives us our first instrumental number as they trade pirouettes for the Watusi and gyrate to something less formal in class. Mobley herself sings and plays the actual title song with its lyrics discussing girls and their relationship to sexual matters at Wyndham's Christmas dance. Jazz songwriter Stan Getz gave the movie its big hit, the sweet and sexy "The Girl from Ipanema," performed by deep-voiced, low-key Astrud Gilberto. The Rhythm Masters give us another dance routine at Sun Valley, "Beat Street Rag."

Popular British Invasion band The Dave Clark Five performs two numbers, "Whenever You're Around" at the school dance and "Thinking of You, Baby" at the rally. Likewise, the original Animals also do "Blue Feeling" early and "Around and Around" at the rally. The Jimmy Smith Trio get "Comin' Home Johnny" and the instrumental dance routine "The Sermon" at Sun Valley. The Standells get two of their major hits at the masquerade party, "Bonie Maronie" and "The Swim." Freddie Bell and Roberta Lynn join the Bellboys for "Talkin' 'Bout Love."

Trivia: First film for Mary Ann Mobley and last for Joan O'Brien. 

Filmed on location at Sun Valley, Idaho. 

What I Don't Like: First of all, while the running gag with Terry's married friend Lynne, played by Nancy Sinatra, spending the vacation with her new husband in their hotel room is funny, Sinatra really could have been given more to do...like actually singing. Though this has its comic moments, it's not quite as spoofy or joke-a-minute as the Beach Party films. Frankly, the political rally in the end is kind of sudden and makes very little sense. I wish they'd figured out how to resolve all this back at Sun Valley. They didn't need to return to the school. They barely even mention how Terry finally manages to stay at the college.

The Big Finale: One of the better Beach Party imitations is worth checking out for fans of the stars in question, the genre, or 60's rock and jazz. 

Home Media: Unfortunately, this is also one of the harder-to-find Beach Party imitations. The Warner Archives DVD is currently out of print and unavailable, but at press time, there is a copy streaming for free on the Internet Archive, and you might be able to find the DVD used.

DVD

Internet Archive

Mean Girls: The Musical (2024)

Paramount, 2024

Starring Angourie Rice, Renee Rapp, Auli'i Cravalho, and Jaquel Spivey

Directed by Samantha Jayne and Arturo Perez Jr.

Music by Jeff Richmond; Lyrics by Nell Benjamin

This one actually began in 2002 with the parenting book Queen Bees and Wannabees. It detailed how teen girls form cliques and how to deal with aggressive behavior. Tiny Fey saw the book and thought it would make an interesting teen movie about a girl who was homeschooled overseas and suddenly found herself thrown into a world more feral than anything she encountered in the wild. Mean Girls with the then-wildly-popular teen actress Lindsay Lohen debuted in 2004 and became not only a blockbuster, but a much-loved touchstone among teens who grew up in that era. It became a Broadway musical in 2018, and probably would have run longer than two years if the pandemic hadn't hit. 

The film version was announced in 2020, shortly after the Broadway show closed. It's been a hit all over again since its debut last Friday. How does the story of one girl dealing with the ins and outs of modern high school cliques look nowadays? Let's begin as North Shore High students Janis Imi'ke (Cravalaho) and Damien Hubbard (Spivey) relate "A Cautionary Tale" as they film their garage rock act for Tik Tok and find out...

The Story: Cady Heron (Rice) is newly arrived at North Shore from Kenya, where her mother (Jenna Fischer) did zoological research. She was homeschooled for most of her life and never had to deal with things like cliques or school rules. Damien and Janis warn her to stay away from what they call "The Plastics." Insecure Gretchen (Bebe Wood), silly Karen Shetty (Avantika), and controlling "queen bee" Regina George (Rapp) rule the school with pink-frosted iron fingernails, but Cady is fascinated by them. 

After they invite her to sit with them, Janis suggests Cady reports on everything they say in order for Janis to get back at Regina for humiliating her in middle school. Cady is reluctant at first, but she goes all in after Regina steals Aaron Samuels (Christopher Briney), the boy she has a crush on, at a Halloween party. They do manage to dethrone Regina after an incident at the Christmas talent show, but Cady finds she enjoys the power a little too much and takes Regina's position as "queen bee." Damien and Janis aren't quite so amused, especially after she blows off their art show to have a wild party. 

Regina seeks her own revenge by throwing the "burn book" she and her friends made with insults about most of the girls at school, including one Cady wrote in anger about her math teacher Ms. Norbury (Tina Fey), into the hall. The insults turn the girls against each other, and everyone against Cady. Cady's reluctant to take a stand, until she realizes what their hurtful words have done to their teacher, their fellow students, and each other. Cady finally discovers that love is a lot less controllable than a math equation, and that the best thing anyone can be is themselves.

The Song and Dance: The thing I most like about this one is the updates to bring this teen parable into the here and now. The obnoxious and dated racial stereotypes of the original film were replaced by a far more diverse and eclectic cast. (And at least they specified that Cady was from Kenya, and not just the random "Africa.") Some critics claim this has less bite than the original. I think the kids' constantly filming everything and sharing it online actually adds more, giving the film a dimension of online bullying that was only just starting to exist when the first film came out. 

Cravalho and Rapp dance off with the movie as the tough art student who wants revenge in all the wrong ways and the controlling alpha female who will do anything to stay head of the pack. Wood has one of the most heartbreaking songs in the entire film as Regina's lackey who would do anything for her, and Spivey is adorable as Janis' sweet gay guy pal. Meadows and Fey get a few good moments reprising their roles from the original film as the math teacher who gets caught up in the girls' scheming and the principal who wonders when his school turned into a jungle. 

Favorite Number: Janis and Damian open with their garage rock Tik Tok number in a literal garage as they relate "A Cautionary Tale." Cady sings about "What ifs" while dreaming of normal high school in Kenya. It becomes a wild chorus number when she arrives at North Shore and finds the fast-moving student body to be more feral than anything in Africa. "Meet the Plastics" is Regina's introduction to her and her friends as they reveal the ways they rule the school. Cady admits that she's "Stupid With Love" as the kids sing along with her in calculus. Janis and Damian claim Regina is an "Apex Predator" who destroys anything in her path. This plays out with Gretchen's heartbreaking "What's Wrong With Me?" when she wonders why Regina has rejected her in favor of Cady.

At the Halloween party, Karen and most of the students claim you have to dress "Sexy," or you're just not cool. Regina warns away anyone who would defy her, before "Someone Gets Hurt." Janis, Damian, and Cady imagine their plot to be a candy-colored "Revenge Party," with everyone dancing in the halls at Regina's dethroning. Damien's attempt at the theme from the Nickelodeon show iCarly comes off kind of goofy, while "Kevin G's Rap" offends the principal. The Plastics' "Rockin' Around the Pole" in the famous brief Santa costumes starts well, until they all fall out of step and Cady is the only one left standing.

Regina, angry and confused over Cady's betrayal, decides that she would rather let the "World Burn" than let go of her throne. Janis, however, admits during the session with all the junior girls Ms. Nordbury calls after school that "I'd Rather Be Me" than be a copy of someone else. Cady finally realizes that every person is beautiful in their own unique way, and that it's better to give support than shove someone down. "I See Stars," she says as she tosses pieces of the prom queen crown to every girl in the audience, including Janis and her girlfriend and the Plastics.

Trivia: Rapp was in the original Broadway cast. 

Look for Lindsay Lohen in a cameo as the head of the Math Tournament.

While the Broadway version closed in 2020, the touring show has been out since 2019, and it's scheduled to open at London's Savoy Theatre in June. 

What I Don't Like: In many ways, this is a rehash of the original film with a more racially sensitive cast and cell phones. Some shots are word-for-word and barely change a thing. In other ways, there's a lot of changes, and not just the race lifts and music. Cady and Regina both had fathers in the original film. They're not mentioned at all here. Coach Carr (Jon Hamm) originally warned everyone in his sex ed classes away from sex, while having sex with his female students on the side. I'm surprised they got away with that in 2004, and they certainly wouldn't do it now. 

Not all of the performances land. Avantika is adorable, but doesn't come off quite shallow enough to make us believe this doe-eyed beauty would follow Regina around. Rice is a wonderful singer, but her Cady is far too dull to be a queen bee or a wannabe, or even someone Janis and Damian would ask to get revenge on the first two. She certainly won't make anyone forget Lohen's star-making performance. Briney is basically there as window dressing. And they apparently cut a lot of songs from the original Broadway show, including an ensemble number at the party, a duet for Cady and Aaron after he finds out she's been lying, a number at the Math Tournament, and one for Cady and the other Plastics.

The Big Finale: Like the heroine of this movie, I'm going to come clean. I never even saw the first film until I watched it after I got home from the movies today. I was an adult when it came out, and not really interested in teen movies. That said, maybe because I don't have that nostalgia and background with the original film, I really ended up enjoying this one. The cast is just as good, the music is decent, and the story works even better with the updating. Give these queen bees and wannabees a shot if you need something fun and uplifting to check out during these dark days of winter.

Home Media: Currently available for pre-order on Amazon. 

DVD

Blu-Ray

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